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Desc:The most stunningly realistic portrayal of the internet ever made by hollywood
Category:Trailers, Science & Technology
Tags:the internet is serious business, cybercrimes, untraceable, hes hacked my car
Submitted:Cinnamon Imperialist
Date:01/25/08
Views:5529
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Comment count is 65
Merzbau
HE'S HACKED MY CAR
Innocent Bystander
HE HACKED STRAIGHT INTO MY WIRELESS NETWORK!

Merzbau
HE'S HACKED INTO MY DOG!

Caminante Nocturno
HE'S HACKED INTO MY GROCERIES!

StanleyPain
They left out the best scene that's in the newer trailers. SHE PICKS UP THE PHONE AND A VOICE SAYS "I AM WATCHING YOU RIGHT NOW!!!!" OMGZ0RWTFBBQ!!!!

StanleyPain
HE'S HACKED INTO MY IPOD!! NOW HE KNOWS EVERYTHING I LISTEN TO!

theSnake
HE'S HACKED INTO MY ALF DOLL!!!

IrishWhiskey
HES HACKING THE INTERNETS!!!
HE NOW CONTROLS THE WEB!

Xenocide
HE'S HACKED INTO MY FINGERS! CAN'T STOP SELF FROM POSTING HILARIOUS COMMENT IN ALL CAPS!

sinuendo
HE HACKED MY SHOE!
Rodents of Unusual Size
HE'S HACKED INTO AMERICA'S HEARTS!
SolRo
I'm dissapointed that they went for something as stupid as hacking a car, but didn't go full on retard and make it controllable.


Though I think you have to give them credit for showing internet users willingly killing a guy in 20 mins after being told not to.
Smellvin
This is an almost complete rip-off of a Millennium episode ("The Mikado" if memory serves). Also, HE'S HACKED INTO MY BLADDER!
IrishWhiskey
Its a rip-off of a lot of things, and the chances of it ripping off "Millennium" of all things is pretty low.

Mr.Rogers
I foresee this movie making a glorious soundboard for Ventrilo Harassment.

Mark my words "HE"S HACKED INTO MY CAR!" will bring more than one nerd to impotent tears.
kingarthur
HE HACKED INTO MY MIND!
HURF BLURF DUH
HE HACKED INTO MY PEANUT BUTTER! WITH CHOCOLATE!
Gill_Sans
HE HACKED INTO MY CHOCOLATE WITH PEANUT BUTTER!

hornung
they film shitty movies here in portland
Caminante Nocturno
This would make a kickass double-feature with Cyber Seduction, especially if the movie's villain actually calls himself Anonymous.
Monchiles Monchiles
If the villian called himself Anonymous then it would be a Blockbuster no matter what. Also, I'm willing to give this movie the benefit of the doubt and say that it takes place in some random year in the future when hacking a car (because it has an onboard computer that sort of auto drives it somewhere. I mean, we have cars right now that parallel park themselves right?) because somewhat feasible.

happy_ending
If you show it with The Net, you will have a trifecta of "not understanding the internet at all".

HE'S HACKED INTO MY SENSE OF SELF WORTH!

Angel Carver
He got ALL THE WAY into my wireless network!
Squeamish
That means he can see EVERY SINGLE KEYSTROKE

IrishWhiskey
I'm just going to have to assume it was an unsecured wireless network and her computer password is "1234", which is on a Post-it next to her monitor.

mouser
Fuck I'm amazed this kind of crap can get funding nowadays.

Obligatory:

THEY'VE HACKED INTO THE WRITER'S GUILD AND OBLITERATED ANY KNOWLEDGE OF DNS AND TLD ROUTERS.

Bisekrankas
Try to see it as the most epic parody of the 21th century, makes it a bit easier.

Aelric
HE HACKED INTO MY STEAK!!!
C. Eloi Marx
I will only see this movie if it has a scene where someone puts on a VR helmet and gloves to hack into a database. That is my bottom line.
Camonk
Everyone knows you don't hack in a VR helmet, come on man. Be realistic.

Binro the Heretic
I guess they're hoping everyone forgot about that episode of "Homicide: Life on the Street."
Binro the Heretic
Also, when Nice Pete tried to do in Ray and Teodor with that automated knife that collected votes from the Internet.

"They call me crazy, but they can't call me guilty! Not with millions of hands on the blade!"

Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Dear Tom Hanks, your son can't act.
Big Muddy
That's why we look up to his brother Jim.

Angel Carver
IT'S STREAMING LIVE!
Rudy
LULZ = DEATH
Zhou Fang
SPOILERS:

The evil hacker is actually somebody's facebook profile come to life due to a powersurge though a modem.
CaptainFun
Think how many people could become victims of the F5 key.


baleen


One of the worst premises for a movie ever. On that note, I'm going to buy it from the DVD lady on the street.
Fingasmcgee
the first one died in 20 minutes the next one will die IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE!!
Dinkin Flicka
It's not hard when he's HACKING THE MASSES EYELIDS

Stog
DON'T GO ONTO THE KILLER WEBSITE THAT KILLS EVERYBODY PEOPLE

OH NO EVERYONE STOP GOING ONTO THAT KILLER WEBSITE HOLY FUCK YOU'RE MURDERING HIM

QUIT BUYING HIS T-SHIRTS AND HIS EGIFTS
Camonk
Do NOT buy things on the killer's Amazon Wishlist for him, at least. Well not that DVD box set of Sailor Moon, okay?

Adramelech
I saw this for the first time in theaters with a few friends and we all just sort of did a dumb stare afterwards as the reality of this film set in. Sometimes I wonder how videogames and culture can still be portrayed in such unrealistic and archaic ways, then I realize that Hollywood apparently hasn't fully grasped the concept of computers yet.
Princess v2.1
who are you?

I AM LEGION

why are you doing this?

I AM DOING THIS... FOR THE LULZ
Michael Houser
Movie computers function inversely to real-world computers. Back in 'Weird Science' days, a computer system could make a REAL WOMAN out of a Barbie Doll. Nowadays, they are portrayed as the playgrounds of madmen and misanthropes. Which is ... oh. Nevermind.

doc duodenum
On that note, why aren't the serial killers in movies ever women? And hot?

baleen

haven't you ever seen sharon stone's cooter? where have you been?

IrishWhiskey
Someplace much happier and psychologically healthy than the rest of us.

Ursa_minor
HE'S DOWNLOADED THE MAINFRAME AND REBOOTED MY FIREWALL!
KillerGazebo
Sweet flying Buddha. I went to the website, it was pretty fucking awesome. It required me to complete several tasks in order to "shut down one of his mirror sites".

One of these tasks was "hacking a password" which was what most of us refer to as the children's game "hangman". As retarded as this was, it became mind blowingly hilarous when I quickly came to the realization that the secret word was "untraceable". The other tasks are just as funny. Also, it's a screamer, and a lame one at that.
Billie_J_Buttfuck
The hangman game changes, but the username/password stays the same. I can't remember the password, but the username is Owen, and the password can be found in the comments for the 'clue' video.

Big Muddy
The MILF has been compromised REPEAT The MILF has been compromised.
Uncle Fister
HACKER'S SAPPIN MY SANDWICH!
Cheese
/b/ the movie.

He's hacked into my car and now the radio plays nothing but that numa numa kid, fuck!

He's hacked into my wireless network and now my desktop is a picture of a a guy with an afro telling me the pool's closed!



Caminante Nocturno
He's hacked into the FBI's criminal database and replaced the 10 most wanted with lolis!

Xenocide
"He died in 20 minutes. The next one will die in seconds."

Well, I bet the guy who died in 20 minutes would really envy the next guy then, since he didn't have to suffer. If you don't visit the murder website you're just prolonging someone's agony! Go there now and hit refresh 600 times!
yoyo1
ANONYMOUS Vs THE PARTYVAN SOCCERMOM
Pie Boy
I think there's been a gross misunderstanding.
VorpalGuy
"They can catch any criminal with the push of a button..."

Except, ya know, the ones who don't use the Internet.
FABIO2
First Suberbia now this. I'm liking this new trend of summarizing entire lame thrillers, scene by scene, in chronological order.


Firewall was even sillier: starring a remote controlled car toy that jammed every electronic device within 10 miles every time you pushed forward.
Geoff Marr
"Busy night for the bad guys?"

"Even busier night for us!"


keinsignal
HE HACKED INTO A SLIM JIM!
bluiker
ART THOU HACKED?!

Triggerbaby
I come back to this entry every so often just to giggle at the comments.
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