Kitties teach young children valuable lessons in respecting personal space.

He made kitty scared.

Also, what is it about cat scratches that they don't really start to hurt until about 10 seconds have passed. I figure it's the shit bacteria on their claws really getting in to you.

It's their saliva. It's a proto-venom histamine. Highly allergenic. From some cats, even a superficial scratch can raise nasty red welts.

I'm lucky my current cat is mild mannered and hypoallergenic. An unhappy, venomous cat will make any confrontation mutually regrettable. His face probably looked hilarious 5 minutes later.

"Venomous cat" is the most awesome pairing of two words of the Enlish language I have seen in the past month.

So what you're saying is that given a few more millennium, cats could turn into the equivalent of tree-climbing rattlesnakes? My monkey ass is nervous.

Only if you believe in the Saltation theory of Evolution. Now, a few more eons, and then, maybe, venomous (JUMPING!!) kitty things.

I love em for that same reason you hate them: they, at least, have self-respect.