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Desc:You place tiny ADS in NEWSPAPERS and it can MAKE you a FORTUUNNNEE!
Category:Advertisements, Accidents & Explosions
Tags:douchebag, annoying, don lapre, tiny classified ads
Submitted:Chizmurder
Date:06/23/08
Views:6934
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Comment count is 23
voodoo_pork
Am I the only one that really wants a great white to pop out of the ocean and bite this guy in half?
kingarthur
I'm surprised Don hasn't been posted here yet. Certainly, if we were looking for a nexus of evil which typified high-school educated con-artist douchebag pseudo-yuppie America, this would be the one. He's like the personification of Phoenix, AZ call center evil.

Runners up to him would have to be Maxine Asher, her fake accreditation society/scam, and Madison University, whose management was or is made up of some of Don's former employees and employees of other scam artists who had since gone to jail.
afp3683
And what would these tiny classified ads be for exactly? Last I checked, newspaper ads don't quite make money per view like their internet counterparts.
SolRo
He tells you how to do the hard part, all you have to do is find a product that people want to buy and set up an efficient mail order distribution chain....he might as well just send you the money.

futurebot
Sucker...he's given away his business model FOR FREE!

kingarthur
900 numbers?

Camonk
Do you idiots just hate money or what? Sports lines! Psychic lines! Think about... movie phone! TINY ADS!

waxeater
To be fair, these ads are a least a dozen years old, back when newspaper classifieds and 900 numbers were actually something.

glenn
Hey, I surf at that beach! Five stars!
Caminante Nocturno
How many times do you think he's been beaten up for his cartoon surfer rodent voice?

Not enough times.
UnderANeonHalo
40 bucks? Shit, for 15 dollars I'll tell you how you can post "sensual massage" ads for free on craigslist and make dozens of dollars in minutes!
Rodents of Unusual Size
Heeeeeeeere he is...the biggest douche in the uuuniveeeerse

I was always surprised that federal agents didn't show up mid way through his stuff and drag him away screaming.
Jeff Fries
This is him, the youth pastor who stole my virginity
cognitivedissonance
I don't know about you disbelievers. I'm sitting here in my ENORMOUS YACHT, surrounded by GORGEOUS WOMEN (and men, equally gorgeous), my hot tub filled not with water, but with KRUGERRANDS.

You people just don't want capitalism to work, y'goddamn COMMUNISTAS.
Camonk
They hate the free-market is what it is.

Brautwurst_Barbarian
THOOOOOOOWSAND!
Doctor Arcane
He's a high-school drop out who makes money off other people's stupidity. I like to believe he is on a yacht somewhere fucking a model, although he's probably washed up by now.
kingarthur
He used a call center. There were incentives to selling x number of units if you were the telemarketer, like free tvs, etc. I wouldn't be surprised if he's gotten into the diploma mill scam and moved to Mississippi.

glendower
from The Onion:

WASHINGTON, DC—Ushering in a new era of American economic prosperity, Congress announced Monday that the nation's .8 trillion federal budget deficit has been eliminated using famed infomercial pitchman Don Lapre's "Making Money" system.

"For the first time since 1891, America is in the black," Senate Budget Committee chair Pete Domenici (R-NM) said. "Finally, we as a nation can have everything we've ever wanted—a new car, a European vacation, a summer home. And we have Don Lapre and his fantastic system to thank for that."

According to Domenici, the Lapre system—which enabled ordinary federal legislators to make extraordinary sums of money right from their own Congressional chambers in less than 30 days using tiny classified ads—was initially proposed to Congress on Aug. 8 by U.S. Rep. John Kasich (R-OH).

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/30089
boner
He's at the beach because he's homeless and sleeps under a pier.
Lothar
He always sounded like he was constipated and on the toilet. I actually bought this, just because I thought he was cute.
Cleaner82
Rounded down, how many millions do you have now?

sparklefatty
I found a way to go to jail using just my mouth.
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