Jeff Fries Experts say please leave your pets at home and indoors where they will shit all over the place in terror.
Menudo con queso Tranquilizers can help some pets, but they're even better for menopausal ex-sorority girls who "report" for low-rent cable!
Is it pedantic to say "This is not a story"? It's a segment, maybe even an article, but there's absolutely no "story" here.
Mike Tyson?! Fuck you bitch, don't leave me in here with that god-damn dog! Great, where's the food too? Hey this radio station sucks, put on some Slayer! Hell yeah, I know how to rock! I'm going to make my own fire works in the house you can't stop me, I do what I want!