The Onion - Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain's Base

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The Onion - Old, Grizzled Third-Party Candidate Threatens McCain's Base

Desc:	'Joad Cressbeckler'
Category:	Humor
Tags:	grizzled, mccain, The Onion
Submitted:	oswaldtheluckyrabbit
Date:	09/02/08
Views:	4120
Rating: View Ratings	Register to vote for this video Favorited 6 Times
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Take that, Professor Strawman!

hornung

bag of cats

donkey with vipers

Cleaner82

No one was ever named 'Joad'. Not ever. I have to believe that.

Caminante Nocturno

This man lost my vote when he ran my Pappy out of town for stealing a jug of whiskey.

Camonk

"I need to vote for a candidate who I believe will drown a bag of cats."

Ranma X.

"Cressbeckler Believes Obama to be a Shoeshine Boy"

Hooker

Now this is a maverick I could vote for.

rustedmutt

These would be the best debates ever.

Rodents of Unusual Size

Hell, even I know he's right. If you put a bucket on a hog's head, it WILL make him skittish!

I love you, Joad.

Brautwurst_Barbarian

Use Immigrants.

Maggot Brain

I want to vote for this man so hard right now.

Man Who Fights Like Woman

I like him, he's angry all the time.

KnowFuture

JOHN MCCLANE

Xenocide

I'm glad someone is finally standing up against our kids being taught calculators in school.

If ever The Onion could use a recurring character, it's this here Joad feller.

Pillager

AND THEN I KILL 'EM!!!

Wasn't this Tom Tancredo's platform?

Billy Buttsex

This is the best parody of conservatives I've ever seen.

RomancingTrain

You could really learn a lot from this.

Billy Buttsex
Well, considering that it's just overblown stereotyping, I don't have anything to learn. It's like portraying black people as Pootie Tang, or liberals as new-age yoga queers.

Cleaner82
Yoga is a FULL BODY FITNESS SYSTEM goddamn it and I'll not sit here and watch you impugn it.

Desidiosus

Don't forget we all eat granola, too.

fluffy

We're also all socialists

IrishWhiskey

I like how Cressbeckler actually has a better healthcare plan than McCain.

mashedtater

It is good to see my kin out and about.

Pie Boy

i got a tax plan for ya

Herr Matthias

Coming back to this video from 2010, it's interesting how this basically predicted the schism that was going to occur within the Republican Party.

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