I'm sure that enjoying this stage of these shows as opposed to the bit at the end with good singers makes me a bad person. But I'm the happiest bad person I know.
It's always refreshing to see that we Americans do not have the market cornered on the morbidly obese.
Fat parents in slo-mo + Clubbed to Death = awesome
I was expecting that old bitty to reach under a couple rolls and pull out some sub machine guns. Disappointed, but 5 stars nonetheless.
I find it much more entertaining to watch a hopelessly deluded & spoiled child being told the word "No." for the first time in his/her life than watching retards being trotted out for the amusement of the masses.
|Goethe and ernie |
5 stars for that monstrous mother alone. She's utterly horrific.
Where's Ryan Seacrest to keep the wave of angry parents away from Simon?
Seacrest did try to stop her. He currently resides in the magical city hidden between this woman's fat rolls.
|Rodents of Unusual Size |
I don't usually root Simon on, but good god he was on the mark on this one.
That dress is what they use to cover Seattle when it rains.
There is so much to love about this clip, if you're a bad person who takes delight in the failure and suffering of others, which I am.
Even if she was a good singer, I can't imagine she'd have much of a shot with her body type (hard to tell if that's glandular or self inflicted.)
The world of pop culture is not known for its fairness in judgement or open-mindedness.
|Frank Rizzo |
KILL YOURSELF FATHANDS!!!!!
Her heart will go on for another, eh...19 years max.
I wish they'd quit paying Simon to be a dick.
Isn't singing a learned skill anyway? I want to see piano idol. Take people who have had no professional instruction and see who has "talent" at making it up on the piano.
Yeah, Spoon, whatever show THIS is. Anyway, I can't claim to know whether or not she's a good singer normally, but I can say that it's very likely that her main problem here is that this is an extremely high-stress situation (thanks largely to Simon), and she does not have any self esteem or confidence as a buffer against that pressure. Thus, even if she is really a decent singer for whatever events she supposedly won trophies at, all of that falls away when she enters the room with Simon and the other judges to audition for a show where she could have the chance to win far more than just a trophy.
But yeah, she's fat and her mother is a hambeast, and that's hilarious.
Unskilled girl in ugly dress sings, the baron and baroness Harkonnen dispute results.
The Enigma Variations was a nice touch.
Simon Cowell is one of my favorite celebrities. Him reality checking these fatties into oblivion made me extra happy.
Celebrity. Huh. Interesting term for him.
|Dinky Patterson |
"Just downright ignorance."
The same response from Mum after the doctor told her that Emma isn't eating right and getting enough exercise.
Rodents of Unusual Size
It's ignorance on the doctor's part. They can't live off of those tiny sausages...they need the great big ones to feed their whole family. Sausages also make people sing better.
Ignorant people just don't know these things.
|a flaming monkey |
I wonder if they have to get permission to air this stuff. I mean, when you think about it, it's some pretty life ruining shit, being ridiculed and all in front of the whole nation.
You probably have to give them permission to air whatever they want in order to compete, if that's legal. I have no idea how those things work, so I may be (and probably am) totally wrong, but that's my assumption and I'm sticking to it.
Yeah, there's now way they'd let em' get away without airing this.
They agreed to come to a show that will be watched by millions of strangers, they kinda should`ve thought of that beforehand. I assume only the most earnest and naive are undeterred.
It's called a talent release.
Everyone signs them, never thinking for a moment what that actually means.
|Simian Pride |
UPDATE: The Hutts are displeased with the offerings from the empire
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/500443 1/Family-who-are-too-fat-to-work-say-22000-worth-of-benefits-is-no t-enough.html
|Caminante Nocturno |
Whoever sold her that dress spent the rest of the week either laughing his ass off or feeling guilty about it.
"helicopter parents"? Under what set of circumstances could they actually find themselves airborne?
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