Sputum - 2008-10-05 Whoever wrote that girl's lines had a really troubled childhood :(
HankFinch - 2008-10-05 I would agree.
Also see Moustache's 14 line comment on vaginal squirting below.
Moustache McGillicuddy - 2008-10-05 In the 1930's, an alliance of first-rate architects and engineers concatenated to concoct the world's most astounding doll. Five million dollars and forty grueling years later, the ultimate doll was finally completed. "We had to think of something that hasn't been done before," explains Prof. Stiger DelHapples, senior executive of the Lazy Hazy doll project. "We thought of everything. We tried different methods of making her lazy. The first version of the doll fell down too quickly and a squirting mechanism was inducted to create a realistic sporadic vaginal squirt of yellow-dyed water (sold separately). Inability to control one's own faculties is the epitome of laziness." The team ultimately decided this mechanism was too realistic and would cause an uproar in the doll-squirting industry. "It was just better than we expected. We removed the squirter because it was just too good for the undeserving public. They would never understand our passion for unbridled sluggishness." The final doll was released, and even without the squirter, it left the team awe-inspired and tearful. "We has misgivings when it was finally time to start mass-production. We wanted to keep the doll for ourselves."
I wasn't aware Phil Hartman did voice overs for doll commercials in the '70's