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Desc:For the children...
Category:Business, Arts
Tags:penis, wal-mart, straws, parenting
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Comment count is 36

This lady needs to spend a few days at home with a blanket and a few Cormac McCarthy novels.
That dude has a fabulous tie.
So what if it is a penis? If you don't want your kid seeing them, just throw them out. News flash, seeing a cartoonish depiction of a cock isn't going to scar anyone. And the kids older than her that she's worried about are already drawing their own on every surface anyway.
Bill Murray, huh?

It doesn't get a lot more white trash than that.
neither does buying crazy straws at Wal-Mart

Right.. I'm sure they are carcinogenic.

Cocks? No way! Lead-laced PVC "fun straws"? Sure! Developmentally delayed kids? Hell yes!

I have those straws at my house right now. Can't wait to get home and check for cock-straws.
Just noting that the submitter of this video has an appropriate handle =)
Sometimes a straw is just a straw.
The funniest part of this is pausing the video to read her Wal-Mart receipt.
Mountain Dew, cake, chocolate syrup, Pop Tarts, punch, crazy straws. Somebody's having a party!

Not just any cake! Pills Cake!

Lets not forget store brand soda-pop!

I was going to tell you that I wasn't sure Dr. Thunder was store brand because I thought I'd seen it in other places. But I was wrong, it's a Wal-Mart drink. I also learned that Dr. Thunder is also called Chunda... God knows why.

"I just couldn't think of anything else," as I had penises on the brain.

"We weren't sure whether we should cover this story," but then we realized that jack-shit ever happens here and we have an hour to kill.
Albuquerque Halsey
needs "Les Nessman" tag
Hay Belly
A nation of prudish whores.
Oh come on now. It's West Virginia. If you don't have something to subtly reinforce that sucking on dick can make a fun party, your daughter will have nothing to do all day when she drops out of school in a dozen years.
Big Muddy
It ain't by-god West Vergina daggone it! It's Ashland, KenTUCKy my hometown!(I mean Rush but I won't split hairs.) Which if you may recall also ran afoul of of this kooky character:

And she's from Ironton, the dingleberry on Ohio's tail.

I'd be offended if I was given one penis that small, but two... Hmmmm... lets ask the viewers!
It's a COCK AND BALLS!!!!!
It's a rocket ship!

One eyed monster!

It kind of looks like a bell to me.

Maybe I should make a run for the border.
A bell END!

Rodents of Unusual Size
This kid and any other that sees these straws is going to grow up to be a pole dancing nymphomaniac...then this woman will be proven right!
Man, that's an attractively priced radiator.
That kid obviously isn't keeping her busy enough.
Big Muddy
Having all this sport made of my state on POENEWS and here of late has shook me out of my seasonal blahs. I seriously don't know how this slipped past me though, as I'm slightly obsessed with WSAZ. I'm forwarding this to all my friends as we speak. Thanks sinuendo!
Binro the Heretic
"I am very upset that my daughter saw these offensive straws! Here, let me lay them out so she can see them again!"
"These dicks are so offensive, I want them off shelves so no one else can see them. These dicks. These dicks right here."

Testicles of Doom
If you look for dicks, you'll find them.
She needs to suck on "the crazy staw". Damn fly-over states.
Obviously a tie-in to that new Sega game.
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