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Desc:'For Some Reason, I Find Myself Ironing Naked During Six Feet Under.'
Category:Classic TV Clips, News & Politics
Tags:Andy Rooney, Useless Old Man, United, States
Submitted:Crucifried
Date:01/02/09
Views:1238
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Comment count is 12
dueserpenti
When he was about to explain why he liked to read foreign newspapers, I was hoping it would have something to do with broadening his horizons, global village, but nope, dumb old man jingoism. I really hate the elderly.
citrusmirakel
He mentions in the middle here that "We're already taking too many holidays from work", which is interesting to me - A man who's spent decades producing the laziest possible form of journalism, and he's really down on the idea of other, hypothetical people slacking off at work.

The position of "Assistant To Mr. Rooney" must come with a hell of a history of suicides.
Caminante Nocturno
Twisted old ferret.
Hooker
Christ, he's just now getting up to speed with the Czechoslovakia split?
zatojones
when he was a kid it was still probably part of the austrian hungarian empire, so cut him some slack

Man Who Fights Like Woman
No Andy, Czech Republic and Slovakia are not at all like your hypothetical "United" and "States."
Stupid Lisa Garbage Face
I like how some of his sentences just run together. "...and was fined 150 pounds for littering, more low cut dresses than news."

sosage
That dress covered her knees. Fucking old people.

pastorofmuppets
Normally I can get through Andy but the bit about Czechoslovakia was too much.

Who the hell is so proud of his ignorance that he boldly states, in complete defiance of history and reality, that Czechoslovakia's split would be like calling one country "United" and another "States"?

I know someone already mentioned it, but, what in all fucking hell would prevent someone from seeing how worthless they are for saying that? Andy Rooney, do you not have access to books? What about other people? Is it that hard for you to give enough of a shit about countries outside of ours to realize that, not your joke was in not only in poor taste, but it revealed you to be a moron at a deeper level than any of your previous segments could have?

Do buy food at A&P, or just tear apart small rodents and birds and feast on the organ slop within? Are you even a man? Or did someone concentrate everything that's terrible about society into solid matter, roll it into thin sinews, and meticulously craft a ranting automaton out of them?

What I mean is, are you for fucking real Andy Rooney?

What does this jibbly sack of ugly have on you, CBS? Why do you fear him so?
Crucifried
From Wikipedia:
"In 1990 Rooney was suspended without pay for three months. This punishment was for saying that "too much alcohol, too much food, drugs, homosexual unions, cigarettes [are] all known to lead... to premature death." Also, he wrote an explanatory letter to a gay organization after being ordered not to do so, a letter many found offensive and distasteful. After only four weeks without Rooney, 60 Minutes lost 20 percent of its audience. CBS management then decided that it was in the best interest of the network to have Rooney return immediately."

That is what he has on CBS. No matter how stupid this man is, 20% of the people watching 60 Minutes are watching JUST FOR HIM.

pastorofmuppets
I'm glad it's only 20%, I had figured it to be higher.

Helena Handbasket
I know quite a few Czech people, they have wonderful self-esteem.
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