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Desc:What happens when preschool teachers get elected to public office.
Category:News & Politics, Humor
Tags:economy, Bobby Jindal, stimulus, patronizing vocal inflection
Submitted:ihounokyaku
Date:02/26/09
Views:3373
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Comment count is 71
Camonk
My favorite comparison is Kenneth Parcell, from 30 Rock. Though honestly I think Kenneth, with his experience in leading boring tours, could've given a better speech than this condescending trainwreck of horrible rhetoric.
IrishWhiskey
"Hello, Hola, Bonjour, and welcome to New Orleans! Or as we like to say, 'Nuoorlans.' Our city was founded in 1718, and refounded in 2005. It is a city of wonderful art, culture, and a diverse and population, or at least will be at a date TBD. If you look to the left, you'll see the evil government levees that should we are dismantling because they were put there by the government. To the right, some laid-off workers whose benefits I rejected to win points in the 2012 primary! And don't worry folks, we don't have any fancy "magnetic levitation" trains or any of that witchcraft here. No natural disaster warning systems either. As my Uncle Jasper used to say, 'If God had wanted us to avoid hurricanes and volcanoes, he wouldn't have sent them.'

Oh and look! Its our friend, Mr Racist Sheriff! He's stopping Mr Jordan and detaining him. Don't worry folks, we'll be fine. He knows white folks don't commit crimes. Maybe we can help Mr Jordan by purging him of evil thoughts. Like the time I performed a violent exorcism on my girlfriend and it cured her cancer!"

kingarthur
I agree with you, but you're obviously not aware of the tiny little stretch of land from New Orleans to Mobile, Alabama, and its inherent cultural difference to the rest of the South.

The traditional South HATES and DESPISES New Orleans, Biloxi, and Mobile.

I don't know if its the casinos, the 24 hour selling of beer, the fact that some people can actually make an attempt at being culturally informed, civil, and happy in those three towns or what, but believe me: they have it in for them and would love nothing better than to see the wrath of their angry god smite all those fornicators. Jindal is also in Baton Rouge and is therefore not playing to the heathen Catholics in New Orleans and on the Coast. He's playing to the Old South bible-beaters.

IrishWhiskey
That wasn't meant as a humorous exaggeration of his religious pandering. He really performed a violent Catholic exorcism on his college girlfriend while holding her down. He did this to rid her of demons, and then claimed it cured her cancer. Here's the paper he wrote about it:
http://www.newoxfordreview.org/article.jsp?did=1294-jindal

The GOP front-runners for 2012 are a woman who speaks in tongues and prays for protection from witchcraft, Kenneth Page the Exorcist, a baptist minister who wants those with AIDS to be locked up, and a guy in magic underwear. All are creationists.

Thersites1960
My God, it IS Kenneth!

Seems like a nice enough guy, but I think I stopped before i got to the part that would have pissed me off.

P.S. Does anybody else get the feeling that the Republicans have decided to embrace affirmative action in a big way?

kingarthur
IrishWhiskey, you have GOT to be kidding me. I know you're not, so thank you in advance for the bounty I am about to receive by going to that link.

Aelric
Oh god...
Frank Rizzo
beat me to it.

whensaidthemoon
I only made it to 1:33.
This is like a children's educational video about Betsy Ross. -1 star because of budget cuts.
baleen
Ladies and gentleman, The GOP's Great Southern Hope.
Johnny Roastbeef
Hey Kids, It's ME! Your Pal BOBBY JINDAL!!!
chumbucket
this would have fit better in a slideshow presentation with beeps to indicate when to change slides
IrishWhiskey
So according to the Republican governor of Louisiana, and prime GOP Presidential candidate, the lessons of Katrina are:

1. Government should do less in responding to natural disasters
2. Early warning disaster systems are a waste of money
3. We should trust the Republicans to lead in a time of crisis

SteamPoweredKleenex
Either #1 contradicts #3, or the GOP executed #3 by doing #1 when Katrina hit.

Quadruple think?

Wytze!
This is their big hope for president in 2012???

Ho ho ho! The Republicans are fucked!

Camonk
They've still got both Mittens AND Palin. At least they're all some form of minority. I think they're hoping that they randomly hit the RIGHT minority to beat a black guy, since that's probably the only reason Obama won.

Pillager
Can Joe the Plumber be their Secretary of State?

rustedmutt
Piyush has a very punchable face...like a tan lovechild of Jerry Seinfeld and John Travolta.
SteamPoweredKleenex
I dunno. He kind of reminds me of "Lester," the sidekick of ventriloquist Willie Tyler.

That could be accentuated by the fact that Jindal sounds like he's being vocalized by someone trying not to move their lips, but the effect is startling.

Stog
Bobby Jindal, Your Designated Junior Museum Tour Guide.
citrusmirakel
This guy currently is a serious favorite for RNC nomination in 2012.

OH BOY!
zatojones
I'd say he's being condescending, but I think he actually likes talking this way
1394
I was so confused when this came on.
Hooper_X
These women are making adobe. Can you say adobe?
revdrew
Five stars.

Crucifried
Our strength is not found in our government, but in our people. Our people, who make up our government.

And our government is constantly teetering on disaster.

Because of the people in our government.

Crucifried
Also: Fuck Volcano Monitoring, volcanos never hurt anyone.


dueserpenti
I lasted 23 seconds. Is this the best they can do?
The Townleybomb
This was so bad I actually feel a little sorry for the guy.
Vestigial Johnson
Jindal’s response was delivered in a humble, sincere and intelligent manner. Apparently, the 3 traits we all forgot existed since Obama became president.... ;)

49 posted on Wednesday, February 25, 2009 10:00:38 AM by BossLady ("WE are the origin of all coming evil" ~~ Carl Jung~~)
Nikon
Well, now I don't feel bad about flubbing a job interview the other day.

chumbucket
somebody's hiring people and paying them?

fatatty
What's weird is when he's on Meet the Press he sounds intelligent and talks like he's talking to adults. I guess when he talks to the average Joe he knows he needs to lower himself to a third grade level. Maybe he's just getting ready to compete with Palin.
Meerkat
Maybe he's TALKING to Palin.

Desidiosus
At least he didn't wink at the fucking camera.

simon666
i got :25 in.
Cena_mark
Why doesn't Jindal get the same mindless fawning that Obama does? Is Indian not count enough as a minority for you?
Desidiosus
With Obama the mindless is directed AT him.

With Jindal the mindless is coming FROM him.

Stog
You like being talked down to, don't you?

IrishWhiskey
Weird right? And for some reason they are making fun of Micheal Steele and Alan Keyes, even though they're black. Its like liberals have no ideological consistency whatsoever. Just pick a side on the race war, stupid Democrats!

Cena_mark
Criticism of Obama was considered 'racist' but its Okay to critize this guy and Alan Keyes. Liberals are so hypocritical. Conservatives criticize Obama for Ideological differences just as you criticize these Republicans for the same reasons.

HarveyTibbar
Racist criticism was considered racist.

Intellectual criticism wasn't noticed because everyone was focused ON THE RACIST SHIT!

SteamPoweredKleenex
Cena, remember how the GOP claimed that any criticism of Harriet Miers being nominated for the supreme court was "anti-woman" and "hypocritical of feminists?" That is, until even the dimmest Republican realized that she wasn't qualified to answer the switchboard at the Supreme Court, much less make any decision of more impact than "what's for lunch?"

And so, too, you guys said that opposing Alberto Gonzalez was racially motivated and had no basis other than a secret hatred of Hispanics... until it's been shown that he had quite a heavy hand in politicizing the DoJ and carrying water for some of the more extreme (possibly unconstitutional) positions of the Bush administration.

But keep on defending this guy. It'll only make it funnier to point and laugh at your posts down the road.

Corman's Inferno
It's fun to see your party flailing like drowning victims in Hurricane Katrina, Cena_mark.

"They got a woman? WE'LL GET A WOMAN! They got a young, charismatic minority? WE'LL GET A YOUNG, CHARISMATIC MINORITY! See, we're relevant! We're relevant as hell! Oh god, please listen to us!"

Rodents of Unusual Size
Liberals are hypocritical, what with not making racist jokes about the minorities in the party they oppose and just calling them out for their idiocy instead.

Wait, is this hitting home for you, Cena? I know that juggalos are a repressed minority...perhaps you can run for office!

baleen

Cena, I think it has something to do with the fact that he's terrifying and that he changed his name to "Bobby" because he was inspired by the Brady Bunch.

Seriously, the Republican party is hilarious. It's like watching a bunch of rednecks set their legs on fire repeatedly hoping that eventually a cheeseburger will appear.

StanleyPain
Most of you probably know this, but for those who don't: the mag-lev train in Las Vegas is a total, bullshit, made-up story/meme the Republicans have come up with as one of their 100% lies to create opposition to Obama's stimulus package (similar to the out and out lie about Acorn receiving billions).

Certain states are being alotted X amount of dollars for spending in their transportation budget. Someone in Nevada came up with the idea of the levitating train thing which has very little popular support there. However, if their government wants to spend the money this way, they can. The money, however, is NOT being specifically given to or earmarked for Nevada to do this.

It's the same basic principle with the volcano study funding (which is actually pretty damn important, not that Republicans would know anything about science)
RockBolt
Although honestly I have always thought that the best possible place to prove the mag lev high speed train concept in the US is from Vegas to LA. I-15 is a solid 250 mile traffic jam every single weekend and there is jack shit in between. Alleviate traffic, fuel commerce, and save firefighters and paramedics from Vegas and Cali from having to respond 50 miles to as many spectacular car wrecks

IrishWhiskey
Yes, but what benefit could connecting two of the world's biggest tourism and population centers with a low-cost mass-transit system possibly have for the economy?

Corman's Inferno
03:28 - Hey, Jindal, isn't the bureaucrat in this story Mike Brown? You know, the guy your fucking party put in office and then congratulated as people in your home state were drowning to death.
IrishWhiskey
Aw, the comment disappeared.

kingarthur
Us New Orleans residents know what to do with people like you, cena. Back up so your desperate flailing doesn't pull any of the rest of us under.

Senator_Unger
So, it's not Bobby Jindal's fault that he's a comically terrible speaker or inept leader; it's the fault of the lower class citizens of NO for not driving the cars they don't own to the second houses they don't possess, away from the danger zone?
I know it's a tall order for you Republicans but could you possibly stop dumping all over the people who already have the shortest end of the stick in our society?

jangbones
one of the lowest points in the recent history of the Republican party
IrishWhiskey
What, you mean since last Tuesday? 'Cause even then I'd disagree.

VoilaIntruder
How can you tell? Both my charts and graphs (of which I have many) fell well below threshold in the early 90s. What chart management software do you use? Is it compatible with Win3.1? Does it have multimedia?

Dan Druff
Hold on - did he seriously imply that if his dad missed a payment to the doctor who delivered him, the doctor would reposess the baby?

dead_cat
It would have been a completely pointless statement to make if he *hadn't* intended to imply that the doctor would have done something drastic in response to his parents missing a payment.

DMKA
lol southerners
Rodents of Unusual Size
lemmetelyastory

His story where he inserted himself into the great boat fight during Katrina made him sound like 80.
Bort
And of course, it has since been revealed that his boat story didn't actually happen.

Mad Struggle
He has a bright future in children's programming.
glasseye
AKA the republican party, because only children believe their bullshit.

dead_cat
They cut out the first few seconds, where he first shuffles out of the shadows and into view like some kind of especially deranged zombie.
Syd Midnight
He's a brown person, but he's one of those smart brown people who are almost white, not one of the scary monkeylike brown people.
Calamity Jon
This is a response?
joelkazoo
Oh, GOD! When I first saw this on TV, I screamed "I'M NOT FUCKING 4, BOBBY!"
Banal Intercourse
A source at Disney has confirmed that this is going to be playing in the lobby at the Hall of Presidents on a loop while you wait in line.
tardsmashers
Did he say "My mother was 44 1/2 months pregnant"
kwash
I love how he ends the story about his birth with "Lucky for me, my father never missed a payment."

What exactly would the doctor have done, crammed him back in his mom or something?
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