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Desc:The people must be informed!
Category:Horror, Accidents & Explosions
Tags:wtf, The Onion, flatulence, arrested for farting, oh god this isnt satire?
Submitted:kennydra
Date:03/25/09
Views:2034
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Comment count is 26
Cleaner82
On the ticker: "UK: Nuclear, chemical terror threat growing"
tamago
First thing I noticed as well.

FineFilter
Fuck man that's good. Put these 5 in the bank Cleaner.

splatterbabble
Florida breeds 'em stinky! I saw this in the newspapers.

-1 for no re-enactment.
Hooker
I am welling up with such murderous rage right now.
allcaps
Well, for goodness sake don't do it in here. Go outside.

simon666
Actually go to Florida and let out your rage.

Caminante Nocturno
I've never met a school bus driver who wasn't an asshole.

I just wanted to point that out.

Yep.
Aelric
To counterpoint in all fairness, Mother Teressa would turn into an asshole if she had to drive a school bus. That is a job I do not envy.

hornung
1-my brother used to be a bus driver in the winter in alaska since there is no call for a tree surgeon 10 months out of the year. he once chased a moose away from a kid to save his life.
2-otto
3-the lady from sweet hereafter.


you only think bus driver's are assholes because they could always see you playing with your manga dolls since there wasn't much distance from front to back on your bus.

simon666
We had a cool school bus driver, but word had it she grew and smoked all kinds of weed, so I guess it's a trade off.

ProfessorChaos
To counterpoint, Mother Theresa already was a sadistic fraud...

Hooper_X
Man, we had the awesomest bus driver freshman year. He ran dirt track races on the weekends, and played Motown on the bus every day.

He was also black, which did not sit well with some of the ignorant fucking cracker kids on the route, nor did it sit well with their awful too-poor-and-ignorant-to-get-into-the-KKK families. One time, I swear I thought either he was going to get off the bus and kick the shit out of this one kid's dad, or the dad was going to get on the bus and get the shit kicked out of him.

So there are cool bus drivers out there, it's just that the job is not particularly cut out for anyone who isn't an asshole.

Caminante Nocturno
Do not speak ill of my manga dolls, you toad.

Urburos
HALT, YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR DISTURBING THE PEACE.
Rovin
The only thing that would have made this better was actual video footage of someone - ANYONE - even remotely involved in this matter that had actually taken the time to make a statement on-camera.
athodyd
When I saw "Stinky Suspension" I thought it was somehow referring to the bus' suspension and one thing led to another and I farted on a cop
Albuquerque Halsey
http://www.toothpastefordinner.com/021009/farting-ticket.gif
Mad Struggle
Not too bad, except for the other kid getting arrested.

I once let loose a 20 second blast in middle school and nearly got suspended. But as I later explained, I asked to be let out to the bathroom several times.
phalsebob
I don't know which is more wirth of 5 stars: that fart stories make it on CNN or that some kid was arrested for farting.

Land of the free my ass!
MrBuddy
It's not news, it's CNN: the continuous nonsense network (please refer to http://www.fark.com/).

boner
National news
Smellvin
"We are in great haste to construct a magnetic telegraph from Maine to Texas; but Maine and Texas, it may be, have nothing important to communicate. Either is in such a predicament as the man who was earnest to be introduced to a distinguished deaf woman, but when he Was presented, and one end of her ear trumpet was put into his hand, had nothing to say. As if the main object were to talk fast and not to talk sensibly. We are eager to tunnel under the Atlantic and bring the old world some weeks nearer to the new; but perchance the first news that will leak through into the broad, flapping American ear will be that the Princess Adelaide has the whooping cough. "

-Thoreau in Walden

I'd say he called that one pretty well.

Nikon
I wonder what he'd say about Twitter.

Foolish Motorcycle Accident
Why is the graphic moving like that
dementomstie
She does a good job of hiding her outright laughter at this story. There are at least two "laugh hiccups" that I see where it seems she's working her hardest not to laugh.

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