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The Onion should really stick to satire like this.
Brief second of silence at the end.
Adulthood rules.
See also: hairless, odorless, sober.
LIAR!
I agree with Female Penn Jillette!
*clapping*
Well presented. Cool.
I have never experienced that in my entire life.
Don't worry. Eventually you'll find the right girl, and the rest will come naturally.
The whole thing is funny but the last line is a shining star.
yes.