fatatty
Chainsaw Crotch Rocket.

IrishWhiskey
Fractal Chainsaw with each blade being made of individual Fractal Chainsaws.

Mad Struggle
Chainsaw nun-chucks had better be in the game.

Comeuppance
I'll just be happy if they combine my favorite weapons from the previous game.

Chaintana.

A chainsaw with a chain made up of 5 katanas.

Or maybe a rocket-propelled chainsaw.

Or gunchucks.

hornung
i can suspend my disbelief with zombies, but the internal torque generated by two chainsaws on a stick is to much to take.

it is as if the developers have never used one before.

voodoo_pork
Chainsaw Moose Head

Camonk
That much is obvious, you odious turd of a person.

IrishWhiskey
I missed the "queer fucking" with lead pipes that occurred in "Dead Rising". Are you sure weren't playing "Wood Rising" the zombie themed homoerotic impalement game?

oogaBooga
Carmonk taking a diametrically opposed position to me only proves that you endorse the terminally retarded storyline and gameplay mechanics of the first one.

Or did you LIKE the humans who can survive 30 shotgun shells point blank to the face?

I guess you just love dressing up like megaman and doing a guile flash kick that takes off zombie heads, huh?

mr666
By god, how could you not love doing a flash kick to knock zombies heads off?
By the way, people whom pour over the storyline of a game inspired by zombie movies in hopes of finding great literature have too much fucking time on their hands.

mcsancherson
counter point you care way too much about a stupid capcom zombie video game

oogaBooga
I like how whenever someone has an opinion suddenly "they have way too much time on their hands".

Way to imitate youtube, mr666 and mcsancherson!

oogaBooga
Bonus funny:
It took about ten seconds of thought to "pore over" the entire nonexistant storyline. The difference between what you and I consider giving attention to is staggeringly dissimilar! Also: I care way too much about zombie semantics, not the videogames who get said semantics horribly wrong.

a flaming monkey
Oh who gives a shit? I saw a moose head, I'm happy. They could have made the player character cooler though. All he's got going for him is a yellow jacket and an anger towards zombies.

mcsancherson
i dont care whether you have free time or not anybody who cares about video games as you do really needs a girlfriend

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
why should women suffer for his whining?

voodoo_pork
If I ever bought a chainsaw, it would not be to cut down trees.

Ryo-Cokey
How about projectile weapons that are usable due to a decent control scheme?

Seriously, you might as well have not bothered. With the exception of Carlito at the beginning, I melee'd every boss in the game to death.

bias
hey while were wishing for things, hows about a protagonist that dosnt look like a tremendous burke.

StanleyPain
He's covered wars, you know.

Cheese
Stanley, some of these are for you.

Aelric
I'll just be happy with mission text size that is big enough to read on a normal tv. Not all of us can afford $500 dollar HDTV widescreens. That was my first 360 return, and not even because I hated the game, but because it was unplayable. That, plus I had no clue how to beat a boss fight, particularly the inmates in the jeep.

crotchy
Main thing I could do without is the constant hassle of the radio guy, who would always call you at the most inoportune moment and then berate you if you had the nerve to ignore him or hang up. The inmates weren't a boss - they were just dicks. And a neat bit of risk/reward game design. A bitch to kill, but if you did you got to steal their cannon.

Still, this somehow seems to be missing some of the, uh, insane charm of the first one. Still, fingers crossed.

Caminante Nocturno
Because you're poor?

Cheese
Hey, step off Caminante, Mr. theSnake is too hardcore of a video game fan to actually own a video game.

mr666
"Douchebag that dresses like white trash as the main character"
I guess theSnake prefers the main character not to be like himself, then.

a flaming monkey
anime girls in cowboy hats!!!! I've got that one! It's great! It's boring, but it's great! Conceptual masterpiece.