It sounds like this BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

I don't even remember the last time I heard a dial tone.

Watson, come here! I want to see you!

I have to dial numbers to call my Aunt Mabel now? Is this Communist Russia? Did we lose a war?

I thought we showed those Russkies who's boss over there in Ko-rea. Sure, our Sabres blew their Migs out of the air, but they just go and sneak some pinko into the system down at old Ma Bell, and now I've got to twirl my finger around like a fairy to call Joe to go bowling.

I swear, this country is going to Hell in a handbasket. You've got those teenagers with their rock and roll music and their hotrods and those damn pegged pants. You've got hopheads and weirdos all through the city so my wife doesn't feel safe going down there anymore, so now you know what MY Saturday is like.

Dial tone, take me away