That orange one sounds like a voiceover actress doing some character.

-1 for no actual fight.

The black and white one is the obvious bad ass here. Right after this clip ended he took the orange one APART.

"Hey, Oreo--listen to my impression of Bob Dylan!"

Hey! I WANNA SIT NEXT TO THE TIRE! THAT'S MY SPOT!

This sort of thing goes on in my neighborhood all the time, day and night. Cats squaring off and making all sorts of unholy sounding noises. You'll hear some sort of demonic, echoing, repetitive RORRRRRAOOOOWWWWRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHROOOOROOOOOWOOOOOWOOOOOW in the middle of the night and be slightly relieved to discover it's only some big fat tabby looming over a cowering young cat in your front yard.

Obviously black-and-white cats aren't welcome on orange-and-white turf.

Oh just get a room you two.

Kitty cats.

The uncomfortable moment when you realize your hissing at an opponent results in a stalemate: both too chicken to attack, both to proud to walk away.

We had this grey cat that lived outside we sort of adopted. We would set food and water out and made a spot from him to sleep that was out of the rain and relatively warm. A few years after "Tom" a new cat, a young male apparently abandoned near our home, was found on our deck mewling to be let inside the house. We did take him in and started to cared for him, too.

"Tom" and this new cat wouldn't get along for anything and I made the mistake of picking "Tom" up while he was staring down the new cat. As I picked up and turned my back breaking Tom's view of the other cat, he bit down on my thumb just below the knuckle which made this meaty "pop" and clawed my left arm. I dropped Tom and ran to the kitchen sink with a thumb and arm bleeding. I gave myself a liberal dose of both rubbing alcohol and peroxide, alternating between two bottles, while holding my arm under a running faucet.

The bite wound healed without a trace and no complications but the scratches, which were superficial, left three faint scars on left arm each about four inches long.

What I'm saying is don't touch a cat when they're doing this.

cat

OH LONG JOHN

OH LONG JOHNSON

OH DON PIANO

MY BODY IS BIG AND PUFFY

YEAH WELL LOOK AT MY TAIL IT IS BIG AND PUFFY TOO

I AM BIGGER AND PUFFIER THAN YOU

They're just warming up, in a minute they're getting in the car, stopping for beer and then setting the GPS for a gig right outside your bedroom window.

-1 for not seeing the orange cat get knocked the fuck out.
Orange asshole cat is an asshole.

I'd really like to squirt the orange one with a water gun right now.

OOOOHHH WHOANOOOOOO.

This was the point last year when I sprayed the local outdoor cats with a hose.

This happened outside my house and one of my neighbor's chihuahuas (whom my asshole neighbors let run in PACKS at all hours of day and night) rolled up on them to investigate. I have never in my life heard sounds like the ones that dog made that night. It was like the cats nailed the dog down to the concrete and disembowled it with a spoon very slowly for about 45 minutes.

imagine time is a long corridor.

at the end of the corridor there is a curtain.

behind the curtain there is a man.

the man holds a black egg.

a cat hatches from this egg.

the cat screams with the voice of a man.

(AUGH)

now you understand time travel.

Black cat is all "Okay! I take back the lasagna joke! Jesus!"

My sister's cat wasn't fond of this video.

Brushing my cat one day I learned that she doesn't like it. With lightening speed she reached up with her paw and clawed me in the face. Here's were it gets fun. Her claw and paw and arm were stuck in what I thought was my eye.

I had to lift up and pull her paw up to remove the claw. As I shakily made it to my bath room I looked in the mirror. My eye was squeezed shut as tight as I could get it and blood was runing down my face. I slowly opened my eye to discover she had missed my eye and tear duct by milimeters.

I have never brushed her since. Neeldess to say she could use it, I think I'll let my enemy do the job for me. I too now have a scar, right next to my tear duct.

It sounds like a Japanese porno movie.

They do this right before they fuck, too. It's absolutely bizarre. The whole cat species is propogated by rape.

A cat video worthy of five stars. Wilford Brimley cat is gonna fuck up black and white kitty.