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Desc:Above average levels of crazy.
Category:News & Politics, Accidents & Explosions
Tags:Alaska, resignation, Sarah Palin, mark sanford
Submitted:kelpfoot
Date:07/03/09
Views:4546
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Comment count is 89
IrishWhiskey
She sounds panicked for some reason. And there are dolphins are laughing at her. Nonetheless, I do wholeheartedly agree that her stepping down is what's best for Alaska.

And Jesus Christ, her using her retard baby as a political prop is ridiculously transparent: "I'm abandoning my job so I can start running three years early, because my kids told me to, because they were so afraid that the liberals hurt Trig." Because as we all know, your profile only diminishes when going from Alaskan governor, to presidential candidate.


Adham Nu'man
She has all the air of a woman who's doing this as quickly as she can 'cause she knows that a nervous breakdown is definitely coming and she's trying to beat it to the punch-clock.

teethsalad
also, incoming ethics investigation.

also probably negates any further investigation into any other possible misdeeds and/or abuses of power, keeps her image a bit cleaner than it would have been otherwise

now she can hurl salvos at the LIE'brul media and any and all enemies, real or perceived, unencumbered by the actual weight of any sort of track record of governance on that would reek of hypocrisy on the fiscal conservative/anti-federalist chunk of the base they're probably going to try and focus their faction's piles and yelling towards

Aelric
You know, This just means that she'll get a job on Fox News and we'll be see her that much more.

spikestoyiu
It would be so great if that were true and he sent that Japanese impersonator to campaign for him instead.

spikestoyiu
Oops. That was supposed to be a reply to Pillager.

Subfuscious
I really hate this lady.
Pillager
I don't.

She's the honest face of the G.O.P.

I truly hope she runs in '12.

Obama won't even have get up off the sofa for the entire campaign.

themilkshark
my stars are for Pillager's comment

FatFatuousNation
Good fucking riddance.
mouser
You wish. She's only doing this to better prepare for 2012.

She gets no stars from me. but the laughing dolphins do.

magnesium
The speechwriter must've forgotten to put the commas in.
charmlessman
I will miss hearing her say "AH-LAH-SKA"

Wait... NO I WON'T!!!


To quite the Retarded Policeman...
BYEEEEE!!!
Chancho
She's going to milk the right wing for every penny they will throw at her. Books, speeches, appearances, and biker rallies will keep her in the money for the rest of her life.
Bort
Just like Joe the Plumber!

Maggot Brain
The two of them should get together for a children's show.

KnowFuture
Didn't she already do the voice of the Mom on "Bobby's World"?

theSnake
So what is her intention here, a run at the Presidency? Senate? An unceremonious fade into obscurity? *crosses fingers*
Desidiosus
I hope it's the presidency, actually.. thereby guaranteeing Republicans get to spend another four years in the wilderness.

oswaldtheluckyrabbit
She could've been President. Think about that.
Jet Bin Fever
I work in mental health and I can tell, she's hysterical. I can hear it in her voice. She's 5 seconds from losing her shit.

On a personal level I hope she pulls it together, but I hope she does it far away from the public sector. Good riddance indeed.
Hugo Gorilla
How did someone with such thin skin get so far in politics?

mashedtater
running in alaska, it is pretty neglected and overlooked.

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
this was difficult to jo to.
Xenocide
Oh, I think I get the metaphor. Sarah is the basketball player, Alaska is the three-point line, and the basketball is Trig's head; you can tell by the way Sarah keeps dropping it on the floor.

(MEMO TO ALL FELLOW HATE-FILLED GODLESS COMMIE LIBERALS: These jokes are going to be dated soon. Use yours while you can! Heil Barack.)
Nithing
This is why women can't possibly hold positions of authority - histrionics, periods and emotions.
Meerkat
No, this is why you don't use a poodle to dig out avalanche victims.

Keefu
Jesus christ shut up.

Cherry Pop Culture
Misogyny isn't funny

Caminante Nocturno
She is just barfing out trigger words at a frantic pace. I know I overuse this phrase, but she really is like a Pavlov's dog.

That is to say, a Pavlov's dog someone injected with a fatal dose of adrenaline.
VoilaIntruder
Either that or someone is just off camera holding a delicious bowl of Kibbles and Chunks and some cue-cards. She's just growling and gnashing her way through the words to get to that sweet sweet treat. It makes it's own gravy, too.

Udderdude
lol america
lol american politics
lol alaska
lol right wing anything
Cena_mark
Like Cincinattus there have been few examples of politicians giving up power. In her case she did it for the people of Alaska and her family. The media picked the president, then the media made the Alaskan governor step down. Shame on the media right here, journalism is dead.
She would have been a better president than Obama. At least she would have done something better than the "Stimulus package."
As we approach double digit unemployment, we'll see its failure, but the media won't.

TLDR: FUCK THE MEDIA, FUCK OBAMA.
Merzbau
you are just ADORABLE

Udderdude
BAWWWWWWWWWWWWW

B. Weed
I can smell the salty mix of tears, snot and jizz from here.

kingofthenothing
somewhere, a coconut floats down a creek, with all of our names in it.

SteamPoweredKleenex
"She would have been a better president than Obama."

I would love to see the reasoning behind that one, especially after having 8 years of a "special needs" president. Most GOPers cite something like "she believes in god" or some other thing that you could train a parrot to say. She's no more qualified to be president than Harriet Miers was to be on the Supreme Court, and even fellow Republicans (the ones that don't foam at the mouth about "the war on Christmas" or other drivel) think she sank McCain's campaign.

"She would have been a better president than Obama."

By having Trig write up a bill for her? Continuing the Bush policies would be a lot like assuming your house would get better if you just let the fire consume it for another few hours.

Bort
Five stars for likening Sarah Palin to Cincinnatus. That is inspired.

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
Holy shit, awesome.

detc
Oh god, tell me more. I can literally taste the tears running down your mascara-soaked cheeks. They're so bitter but so addictive that I simply cannot have enough.

Toenails
Guys, please.

Learn to understand netspeak:

Trolling Lame; Don't Respond

Rodents of Unusual Size
Cena, that is the opposite of the truth. Why would the media want her to step down? Everything this woman does is media GOLD.

ProfessorChaos
Excuse me? She would have done something better then the Stimulus Package?

No. She backed EESA (the first bailout), just like every other politician. Just because she SAYS she would not support an unpopular thing doesn't mean she wouldn't be doing it if she was presently in power. Her track record is quite clear on the subject.

spikestoyiu
Stop replying to him, you idiots.


StanleyPain
So much for being a pitbull with lipstick or whatever dumbshit, redneck analogy.

Of course, the media is pooh-poohing this and pulling a "poor woman" thing, but any REAL journalist worth their salt would be starting a serious national narrative about exactly how this woman thought she was fit for national government (which involved things like, you know, other countries and people who are not nice to you) when she can't even handle a shitty joke by a hack like Letterman without resorting to MySpace level drama on a national level.


Keefu
I want to know how she managed to get the job more than why she thought she was fit for it, but the answer would probably depress me.

Suedeo
Get the job done? I missed the part where she did that.

Keefu
No, get the job. Attain the position of governor. How.

Runic
Did she breathe during that? I don't think she stopped to breathe.
THA SUGAH RAIN
Further evidence that every single woman is hopelessly batshit insane.

Sudan no1
fags are pretty mental too, so you're fucked buddy.

bindle
Dude, would you mind projecting your sexual insecurities somewhere else?

Keefu
Politics is a tough game, lady. I almost feel bad for you.
fluffy
If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen.

(unless you're a woman and you should always be in the kitchen AMIRITE)

kingofthenothing
It's like the Yo-Yo doesn't know the string is broken, and its journey is over.


Goethe and ernie
I'd prefer it if she talked a little bit slower, and sounded a bit less mentally ill.
Hay Belly
It sounds like she's going to do something religious so she's perfect for it.

memedumpster
Five stars for camera man looking for her daughter in a tree.

I once met a woman that Sarah Palin reminds me of. She was a high school teacher and a single mom (no surprise at all) who had a son who's two syllable name always had the second syllable stressed when she spoke it. She hated and mistrusted all young people, or anything else she couldn't control by bitching at it and she always sounded like she was slipping into hysterics when she spoke.

She was a liberal.

"Stupid bitch" knows no political affiliation.
Toenails
Camera Man wasn't looking for the daughter.

He was actually literally rolling his eyes at Palin talking about Trig being ridiculed with those hurtful jokes.

sammitch
Well timed, Michael Jackson was still the lead story on NBC.
Lurchi
She'll be starting a third party. You read it here first.

(The longer, non-edited clip is a lot better. This leaves out "Retreat is just advancing in a different direction" and "The world needs more Trigs.")
theSnake
Just gonna drop this Youtube comment here:

opie73 (5 hours ago)
Deep thoughts from refrigerator magnets.

RFLMAO

James Woods
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO!!!

MaybeAFatGuy
God, I hope she dies next.
Westward
1:11

The horrible hiss
cognitivedissonance
It really feels to me like there are creditors knocking on the Palin front door. I suspect she might have bet the mortgage on becoming vice president, and then expecting a gazillion book deals and speaking engagements as the world's greatest conservative ever ever, and they didn't come.

There's some genuine desperation here.
Hooker
I'm assuming she's being held hostage.
fermun
Crazy lady spouts crazy, tonight at seven.
Mayberry Pancakes
She clearly wasn't about to let Mark Sanford go home with the Most Baffling Press Conference award.
FISTFULLofSOUL
Still hot tho'
Rodents of Unusual Size
As I was watching this, someone set off fireworks at about 1 in the morning as it is officially the 4th of July. I like to think that they were watching this for the first time too.
Old_Zircon
SCANNER IN THE AUDIENCE
TeenerTot
For all you folks saying her motive is to run away in fear from politics:
There is an Alaska senate seat opening in 2010.

Duh.

WE should be running in fear.
kingarthur
Yes, methinks she's definitely going to run for Senate. I think you'd be kidding yourself if you didn't think she was at least seriously considering it.

The scary thing is that to conservatives, this woman can do no wrong. I do, however, think a lot of the vitriol directed at her is pretty severe, but I was never one for shouting at people in politics from the left or right.

Pillager
Senate?

Dudes, she's PRESIDENTIAL timbre.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder

Just ask her.

roughnready66
You can't have CONSIDERATION without the PRAYER. I'm glad she caught herself mid-sentence.


DMKA
"Don't explain: Your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe you anyway"

She took that cynical novelty refrigerator magnet just a little too seriously in her career.
BHWW
I'm seriously pulling for her fade into obscurity. I mean, she wouldn't be the first flash-in-the-pan political personality to do so and I'm tired her and of hearing about her from both bloviating fans who think she'd make a great president and people who feel the need to convince me that she's the ultimate evil via histrionic screeching.
Hooker
I consider myself pretty crazy-against Sarah Palin, but I think it's wrong to cast her as the ultimate evil. I think she's far too stupid for that.

bindle
On the one hand, Palin so cartoonishly represents everything messed up about the GOP, it's hard not to villainize her. On the other hand, the level of bile she attracts is often distressing, especially since there are loads of other Republicans who are way more scary than she is (Dick Armey, anyone)?

The lady's persona is over the top, but she's not as inept as people make her out to be: http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2008/09/22/080922fa_fact_gourev itch

I find her values abhorrent, and her ambitions overreaching, but so many comments about her have a misogynistic tone to them.

takewithfood
bindle has it pretty much right. She's obnoxious on several levels, sure, but what really ticks people off is that so many voters love her - and not despite, but BECAUSE of those same obnoxious qualities. Half of the hatred should really be credited to the voters, not to her directly.

And the sad thing is that even if she fades into obscurity, those idiot voters who would rather vote for what they perceive to be "one of their own" than actual competence are NOT going anywhere.

Riskbreaker
Please start porn career please start porn career.
Camonk
The real news isn't Palin stepping down to get the fuck out of politics because god she can't handle this and so she's quitting now to get her Fox News show up and running.

No, the real news here is that Cena can still get like seven responses to his phoned-in bullshit.
APE_GOD
Who?

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