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Desc:'Christian Hardcore' band rapes pop song. Too evil for 73Q.
Category:Arts, Religious
Tags:white people, hot topic, x-tians, Emotronica, crabcore
Submitted:ShiftlessRastus
Date:07/23/09
Views:1441
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Comment count is 20
socialist_hentai
Well... Slayer they ain't.
zatojones
when will people learn that when you add Christianity to music the only result is shittier music?
B. Weed
Maybe it's just adding Christianity to rock music? Mozart and Verdi did good things with the Requiem Mass.

dueserpenti
Do these people have ears? Is this a joke? I don't understand how this could happen.

Chancho
Dude, who cares about composition, harmony, melody, or rhythm when you have such a powerful message?

revdrew
This pisses me off far more than it really should.
mashedtater
because the original song is so very soft and beautiful.




*sobs*

revdrew
Yes, it is a good song. But even if it were a lousy song it wouldn't deserve this. Nothing.. deserves this.

Document
mashedtater: I had to cleanse myself with the Iron & Wine version after listening to this audial buttfuck. Then I realized that Sam Bean probably makes 1/10th of the cash these little shits pull in from the crucifix-tattoo-above-my-pelvic-bone crowd.

So yeah, I guess what I'm trying to say is "weep some more."

NewHeavenSalesman
To be slightly fair, most current hardcore bands sound just about as shitty.

Wait, I just got to 2:05. Scratch that.
ShiftlessRastus
Looking through the youtube comments, I kept seeing the term "Crabcore", as in "Fuck yeah, Crabcore!" or "Totally Crabbin'".
Google says that Crabcore consists of: Hardcore screaming, autotuned emo vocals, trance or techno breakdowns, matching haircuts, synchronized dancemoves, and "the body contortions of the band's guitarists when they perform. This is the lolloping crab-like stance adopted while a guitar player shreds, and it's not dissimilar to a sumo wrestler having extreme muscle spasms while readying themselves to engage with an opponent."

Crabcore was brought to us by the band Attack Attack:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=me0W5XwO3UA

Here's the article:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/musicblog/2009/jun/23/scene-an d-heard-crabcore
mahlor
This Confide shit is bad, for sure. Really bad. But, man, that Attack Attack song is just about the worst music I have ever listened to. Why the autotune? Why the early 90's techno interlude? Why the hillbilly looking meth chick with the underbite? Why put the chubby guy in an ill-fitting t-shirt?
Its kind of fucking brilliant is an end of the world sort of way.


Adham Nu'man
Older generations used to say about younger generations: "What they listen to is not melodic music, it's just noise. These kids are violent little punks".

Now, older generations can finally look at newer generations and say: "What they listen to is not punk, it's pussified emotional crap. These kids are not violent little punks, they are pushover pussy crybabies"
Ghoul
There used to be a great article on the +/- records message board (R.I.P.) about why you cannot claim to be a Christian and also claim to be into the hardcore or punk lifestyle. I wish I had a link to that article to spam on every shitty Christian metal-crab-grind-tech-crust-punk-emo-core video on Youtube.


IrishWhiskey
Well, it is effective at least. The first words out of my mouth when the 'singing' started were "Oh God" followed by a prayer.

It was a prayer for their painful deaths, but still. Better than most songs accomplish.
happy_ending
Ok, but what does this song have to do with God, exactly?
fluffy
I am thinking it's a sign that the freckles
In our eyes are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned
And I have to speculate ***THAT GOD HIMSELF
DID MAKE US INTO CORRESPONDING SHAPES LIKE
PUZZLE PIECES FROM THE CLAY***
True, it may seem like a stretch, but
Its thoughts like this that catch my troubled
Head when you're away when I am missing you to death
When you are out there on the road for
Several weeks of shows and when you scan
The radio, I hope this song will guide you home

They will see us waving from such great
Heights, 'come down now,' they'll say
But everything looks perfect from far away,
'come down now,' but we'll stay...

I tried my best to leave this all on your
Machine but the persistent beat it sounded
Thin upon listening
That frankly will not fly. you will hear
The shrillest highs and lowest lows with
The windows down when this is guiding you home

tamago
I was all like it sucks, but it's not offensively bad.

Then the dude started singing.
Chizmurder
2:57.

When will this end? This is a sin or something right? The devote their lives to singing shitty screamo for God, and hopefully they do this shit the rest of their lives. And then when they die, they all go to Hell for stealing this song, raping it then killing it. Sorry queers, better luck next time.
Lies, lies, LIES!
I lasted four seconds after the singer came in. What revdrew said: I don't think even "We Built This City" deserves this treatment.
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