Udderdude
Fatties only plz.
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Old_Zircon The technology is definitely reliant on ass fat.
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Lurchi 
am i awake
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Killer Joe
I like the first pair. Instead of winking, they look like one eyeball is rolling drunkenly back into someone's head.
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dementomstie
With the ducks you could sell advertising space by having them say Aflac.
And 5 stars go to the owl. Never has something intentional looked more like a very unpleasant stain.
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Sean Robinson
Well, this is my life now.
Imagine how hard it is for the rest of the inventor's family, who have to deal with a father convinced this is what America needs and who makes them dress up in Winkers jeans while he films their asses.
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mashedtater and then when your friends come over, he tries to market them.
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robe
This'll go great with my airbrushed wolf shirt.
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Rafiki
This is the kind of thing that could only ever find a market with little kids, but should never be worn by little kids.
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mashedtater
by far, the largest sin commited against asses since acid washed jeans.
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Redlof
Still like this better than bullet ball
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TheKingOfPants
I refuse to believe this isn't a Tim and Eric creation.
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ASubmarineSandwich
All I can picture is a horrible mutant waiting beneath the cloth that has a gibbering anus for a mouth and eyes that wink by being sucked into a nictating membrane by some unseen and wholly unnatural musculature.
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Chizmurder
Stupid pants for fat chicks! FINALLY!
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YakooMarkTwo
TheKingofPants: I was just scrolling down to hit login to type "I probably say this far to often about things I see in the depths of the internet, but this seems like a Tim & Eric skit."
Touché.
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chumbucket
5 stars for ass-winking theme music....from SPACE
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nuzzles
Music by Lifetime Movie circa. 1995.
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JSP
god no
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revdrew
Patented, space age, ass fat technology.
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pastorofmuppets
Brought to you by the creator Speedfit Treadmobile.
I wish I could say with certainty that these will never catch on. But I went to a college where people wore pants that had blackletter across the pooper
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charmlessman
I will buy these when they have Pac Man.
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phalsebob
The ones with eyes don't look so much like winking, and more like their ass is eating a cookie.
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Stupid Lisa Garbage Face
I love when the submitters name also works as a tag.
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Random_Hajile
WHY?
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Dr Dim
I love the music! It sounds like duck pants is off to assassinate the cyber-president.
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j lzrd / swift idiot
THIS COMMERCIAL IS FULL OF ASS
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Time Travel Mishap
I never thought the phrase "That woman's ass looks like it's having a stroke" would go through my mind.
Also I like that they used the TV news "is America to fat?" camera style.
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Testicles of Doom
At first I thought that three and a half minutes was going to be far too long.
Then the music started and I knew it wouldn't be long enough...
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Rodents of Unusual Size
This would make such a great infomercial.
Are you not getting enough action? Well how about you put some action on your butt...ALL DAY LONG?!
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plug
Pun Alert!
They need to design a pair with the eyes of Saddam Hussein so they can name them...wait for it...
Saddam Eyes
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kwash
5 stars for action pants.
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Lies, lies, LIES!
I lasted 15 seconds.
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Urkel Forever
*fap*
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OxygenThief
If you don't wear pants your ass is always winking at people.
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cognitivedissonance
The owls are not what they seem.
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