To a T.

Sorry, I didn't even watch the video, I just got angry about fixed-gear riders, is this dude pro fixie then? Christ I hate them, swanning around Hoxotn and playing fucking BIKE POLO, Jesus wept, I'd like to go back in time and kill Hitler's parents, and by "Hitler's parents" I mean "the people that started Vice magazine".

I have a real bike which I use for work which my dad bought, second-hand, in the early 90s. I think it's safe to say it's pretty reliable.

What's funny is that in the meantime, a new menace threatens Portland, and it's name is REALLY TALL BIKES! I mean, I'd seen maybe one or two of them in the past in other places (namely Madison WI) but they're EVERYWHERE here, custom made out of multiple frames! You can't walk down Division Street anymore without seeing like ten of those jerkfaces. You can't really get on one of those things without a fair amount of effort or someone else helping you on, so it's no longer a means of transportation and is now just being a showboating d-bag.

Now with this in mind, I don't think this guy is mad at you, as the hipsters and performance guys have a new common enemy. It's like when Aragorn had to go enlist the help of the Elves to.. you get the idea. On a side note, I saw a Performance kinda biker the other day with a Spandex Jersey with the cover of "The Queen is Dead" on it..

also can I buy your bike?

-1 for not including Tall Bikes
-1 for not including Burley trailers and Bakfiets cargo bikes.

So many hipsters make Franken-bikes in the Alberta Arts district, it blows the mind. Seems like the craziness is down this year, perhaps with the increase in "urban homesteading." Then again, maybe the bike-hipsters are just migrating to SE.

yeah I live by the Clinton and it's gotten fucking ridiculous. You rarely even see a regular fucking normal bike anymore

You West Coast people are behind, those Franken-Bikes were big around the MIT campus back in the 90s.

Obviously you've never heard a little tune about punching motherfuckers in the dick.