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Desc:Douche Quadbike returns!
Category:Educational, Military
Tags:racism, Captain America, ACTING!, Ben Ryan Metzger, douche quadbike
Submitted:ztc
Date:09/21/09
Views:1914
Rating:
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dementomstie
"But I wasn't ready to leave North Africa yet..."
..."Men, I'm not ready to leave North Africa yet."
five stars!
memedumpster
Okay, yeah, that part made me laugh my ass off.

God, I hope Al Qaeda doesn't get hold of this video.

gotterdamm
Does Douche know they already cast a Captian America?

How did he take the news?
sliggy
Five stars for the stunning kind of egotistical jackass it takes to use stock footage of GIs and to turn them into a crowd of racist buffoons, and stock footage of the suffering of starving people, just to make himself look awesome.
Toenails
I can't wait until he submits his ten minute Hulk monologue.

"Nazis try smash blackies but Hulk no want to leave Black Africa yet!!!"
Camonk
Wow, he sounds as douchey as he looks. He tries so hard. In so many ways. If trying were succeeding, this guy could be seven Colonel Americans.
Bort
I could make it only halfway through, but I was pleasantly surprised that he didn't portray Cap as a knee-jerk patriotic jackass.
Xenocide
"When we looked to our flags...we saw no flags!"

Captain America vs. the Nazi Flag Thieves will return after this.
TypicalEllisProtagonist
Wow, so Hitler got a space weapon more powerful than a weapon that wouldn't exist for like a year and half? That cunning little bastard.

I bet he developed working "Paint Star on Shirt Straight" technology years ahead of us, too.
Caminante Nocturno
The part at 9:30 where a little bit of dirt falls out of his shield during his triumphant cry was funny.
RockBolt
Its like a 9 minute set up for that punchline

Kieran27
Hmmm... five stars for effort. This guy clearly was trying as hard as he could to be what he thought Captain America was, and refreshingly it wasn't a super patriot GOP. And I was surprised that he made the 'enemy' he was fighting other americans who wouldn't do the right thing.

Still... not the best execution of his message, but he still earns the stars for effort.
ghostdad
Flawless new york accent.
Rodents of Unusual Size
ERRYBODY LISTEN.

BUTCHOO DON'T KNOW WHO I AHM.

AH REMEMBER AHN THE STREETS UH MANHATTAN.

charmlessman
He keeps referencing SOWJURS. What is that?

erection reset by queer
This isn't nearly long enough.
garcet71283
He's no Reb Brown.
Billy the Poet
The worst diction since Andre the Giant in The Princess Bride. Less charisma by an order of magnitude.
Aelric
Flint Chestflab!
ztc
Hick Gripshield!

sonichronique
Spork Buntbatch

Kieran27
Crud Bonemeal!

Caminante Nocturno
Chunk Bulkflag!

Toenails
Grease Horsecock!

Billy the Poet
Big McLargehuge

zerobackup
Punch Steelrock

kwash
Bolt Vander Huge!

Hooper_X
ACE BOLTMETAL

Chalkdust
Choke Facefist!

Vicious
Punch Rumprack!

ztc
The narration at the start sounds like a dead-on parody of the original Resident Evil. Until he says "two." Who the hell says "two" like that?
ztc
The comments are up to scratch!

"i am a 20 year old African American man living in the hood whit no guarantee on wether i will live to see tomorow. i dont know y, but this video deeply touched me. its time for me to get out the hood. U showed me that white people are not as heartless as i thought. im ready to become somebody. i know that u mean everything you said in this video because those words cannot be mad up.This really inspired me and when i become somebody, i will not forget that this video helped me.
~Crying Thank You~"
gotterdamm
I hope people look back on Douche as some sort of outsider artist.

Each Youtube submission and its following comments acting as some strange sort of performance piece.

Syd Midnight
Yeah, at this point, I not only want to see him play Captain America, I want his townspeople to produce the movie. I really do.

Hooper_X
Oh man, is this really him? That's so great. I'm glad the internet didn't totally ruin his life. He's more than capable of doing that on his own.
Rudy
Way better than another Dr. Horrible clip.
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