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Desc:Flu shot triggers rare genetic condition, hilarity ensues.
Category:Horror, Humor
Tags:Cheerleader, brain damage, eclipse, walk it out
Submitted:MongoMcMichael
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Smellvin
If you laugh at this, you're a garden variety asshole.
If you fap to this, you are my POE brethren.
Camonk
I can't fap to this! She talks normally when she runs. Ruins the whole goddamned thing.

Keefu
don't say "fap" you fuck

ShiftlessRastus
I know somebody whose getting a treadmill for Christmas.
splatterbabble
You beat me to it!

mantang0
so.. spill the beans. who?

NineEleven
She needs to do a Forrest Gump run across the country for a year or so
Man Who Fights Like Woman
Hooray, more people against vaccination!
James Woods
You'll get stars when I'm certain that was sarcasm.

Man Who Fights Like Woman
It was. Fighting like a woman means using technology prodigiously.

THA SUGAH RAIN
The world is a beautiful place, designed by an omnipotent and benevolent spirit.
Also, how much does it suck to be that guy? His ex girlfriends are cracking up.
James Woods
The sex might be great.

Bindar_Dundat
Amazing muscle spasms.

Adham Nu'man
Running is not the only thing you have left you ungrateful woman.

There's also walking backwards.
Rodents of Unusual Size
Don't forget her husband.

Unless he leaves her. I hope for her sake he doesn't, but what are the chances of that?

manfred
1:55 Look on the bright side: the shot cured her abnormally black skin
Hooker
I think we're missing the silver lining here. She doesn't have the flu.

Camonk
Nice try, we all know Dystonia is Dr. Doom's homeland.
StanleyPain
There's articles about this woman all over the interner, but the general consensus is that the flu shot didn't give it to her, the illness is psychosomatic and goes away at certain times and when she does certain things (which isn't a symptom of dystonia).
fluffy
It might not be dystonia but it could be for real. The brain is a really weird ad-hoc collection of things and when it gets into a particular rhythmic groove things start to work differently. Running has a completely different rhythm than walking, and there could be something about that rhythm which helps keep her muscle memory organized in a particular way.

This is the sort of stuff that Oliver Sacks writes about all the damn time.

oogaBooga
5 stars for oliver sacks

spikestoyiu
She's a girl; she's doing it for the attention.
gambol
http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=68940

Yesterday.

Your tags suck.
Scrotum H. Vainglorious
This is the unedited news report not the dance remix.

gambol
I noticed that after I posted this, so I apologize. The 'walk it out' tag threw me off.

Camonk
So you're a reactionary asshole.
Good job!

I'm sorry, man. Things have been real rough at home.

simon666
"Better Sports" tag, amirite?
chumbucket
so can she actually qualify for the Special Olympics? I mean hell, there's your "ringer" right there!
Bindar_Dundat
No, just as a Special Olympics Cheerleader.

HarrietTubmanPI
If she eats and talks backwards or really fast, will she be ok?
HankFinch
how do you eat backwards?... oh, that's gross

glasseye
Earmites.
urbanelf
Why would a flu shot damage your transmission?
SRP
http://tinyurl.com/yjbqcle posted yesterday by Zetojones.

This is all in her head - not to say that its any less real for her, but definitely not the actual physical cause of getting a flu shot. Cheerleader irony aside, its really sad that this will be used to fuel fox news fear mongering about flu shots due to the relatablility of the characters in the narrative: regular cheerleader girl, new wife, happy, then FLU SHOT OH MY GOD LIFE IS OVER. If anything, I would imagine that this kind of fear mongering would only increase the likelihood that psychological dystonia would develop, no?

Basically, fox news is like a flu shot for your brain
kiint
hmm i dunno, theres an upside here in terms of darwinian selection

people who watch fox news believe vaccines and flu shots are bad

same people don't get them for their kids because of fear-mongered paranoia

same peoples kids have a higher mortality rate resulting in less contribution to the gene pool.

sounds like a win-win, amirite?!

B. Weed
kiint: you're ignoring a little phenomenon called "herd immunity."

Doctor Arcane
Obama Hitler is making our white women walk backwards!

kiint
Dammit B.Weed you ruined a perfectly good theory

Rodents of Unusual Size
Wait what? How is that possible?

jangbones
she walks like the Redskins play
twinkieafternoon
I see what you did there.

lixtro
I kept hoping this was from Onion to the end.
Meerkat
And yet she's fine in the reverse cowgirl position.

But her husband prefers it the other way.
Rev. Blackson Pollock
You could flip the fear mongering on it's ear and use the possibility of this happening to YOU or YOUR children to back stem cell research. If you're in this kind of jam maybe magic fetus pieces aren't so bad afterall.
BOOSH
GOOFBALL DISORDER
HankFinch
Wheeeeeeeeee!

Poor Excuse
"That's one small step for man; one leap, three sorta bouncy un-timed steps, seven crisscrossing arm swings, and an alcoholic tongued sputtering for young Desiree Jennings.
Lies, lies, LIES!

BACK THAT ASS UP!



Binro the Heretic
If there is a God, he sure must hate people.

:(
Phil
Everytime she moves it's like an MC Hammer video
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