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Desc:Want to be a real man? Well, get rid of your Counting Crows CDs and start wearing a leather vest.
Category:Humor, Religious
Tags:Found Footage Festival, leather vest, crazy christians, counting crows
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Comment count is 32
wtf japan - 2009-10-27
Do not ask a Christian for a light.
zatojones - 2009-10-27
It might just be worth it for the girly punch and "Yo soy loco por Jesus" line

Enjoy - 2009-10-27
I got your burning bush right here, hoss.

Mocos Locos - 2009-10-27
No, él dice "Yo loco por Jesus". Es mejor como asi.

phalsebob - 2009-10-27
Once again, it is impossible to discern parody from the actual.
Walker - 2009-10-27
Wait... I thought Counting Crows WAS Christian music?
fluffy - 2009-10-27

Caminante Nocturno - 2009-10-27
Me crazy for Jesus.
lucienpsinger - 2009-10-28
¿Yo reprobo a Español? ¡Qué unpossible!

SixDigitDebt - 2009-10-27
I'm going to use that response next time someone asks me for a light.

"I'm gonna let it shine!" *SMASH*
SixDigitDebt - 2009-10-27
and my fifen

Xenocide - 2009-10-27
"Hey Joe, wanna go out for some wine?"

"No, thanks, I'm gonna turn water into PAIN."


"Hey Joe, wanna look at pictures of boobies?"

"No way. If thine eye leadeth you to sin, pluck it out."

(plucks his eye out)

"Hey Joe, there's a giant whore in the sky riding upon a beast with a thousand foul names! Wanna go ogle her?"

"........yeah, okay."

dementomstie - 2009-10-27
Wow, I've clearly not gone to church enough because I can't bite through CDs without them causing my mouth to bleed horribly and jagged pieces of plastic to go shooting into my mouth.
Rev. Blackson Pollock - 2009-10-27
They teach you that just before they graduate you to handling snakes and drinking strychnine for the lord. Plus the soft palate damage helps you speak in tongues more effectively.

SteamPoweredKleenex - 2009-10-27
The REAL "Cars and Babes" magazine wouldn't use Bodoni and University Roman for its masthead.
Hooker - 2009-10-27
So if I have this right, music, television, decorations, and the opposite sex are all sins?
Enjoy - 2009-10-27
Only if you are mormon or jewish. Grace is not understood by those groups.

Rev. Blackson Pollock - 2009-10-27
That's only because god doesn't drop day planners on them.

Squeamish - 2009-10-27

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2009-10-27
This is what the people who raised me really believed. :(
Cleaner82 - 2009-10-27
How many smokers has your dad decked lately?

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2009-10-28
Okay everything except that part since they all smoked.

But yeah, music is the devil? Totally.

charmlessman - 2009-10-27
Well that's his problem right there. Green Day, Counting Crows and Pearl Jam? He was a pussy to begin with.

No Slayer fan would have capitulated to a trapper keeper falling from the sky.
Camonk - 2009-10-28
Unless it had like a wicked ass drawing of a dragon and a naked chick and like skulls and blood everywhere

charmlessman - 2009-10-28
OHHHH!!! You know the Slayer Fan's weakness! TELL GOD NOT!!

Xenocide - 2009-10-27
I choose to interpret "love Jesus with all your heart" as "punch your friends and insult bands from the 90's."
fatatty - 2009-10-28
Well considering he never read a bible and probably doesn't know who Jesus is, it's not the least logical thing to do in that situation.

Worshiping an old man in the sky would probably be the last thing he'd have thought of.

Sean Robinson - 2009-10-28
I like that he has a literal shrine to Marissa Wilson, a girl I'm fairly certain he was no longer allowed within 500 yards of.

Duder was already loco por fucking everything.
APE_GOD - 2010-03-05

kingofthenothing - 2009-11-17
He's going to become a Mexican monk now.
oddeye - 2009-11-25
Better level up so his fists do more damage and he becomes immune to time stop.

Old People - 2012-10-27
Y'all know this is a joke, right?
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