|Caminante Nocturno |
Ten seconds in, and everything goes wrong.
|Sudan no1 |
I don't care if his name is Mitsubishi Yojimbo, the main character's gotta be white!
I like king of fighters. A lot. And I still dont know who the fuck any of these people are supposed to be representing. I think I saw Kyo throwing a flaming sword, but the rest of it is just poppycock. POPPYCOCK!
You could play King of Fighters for a thousand years and still never make the connection without the title card at the end.
What i wonder is, who is this movie made for? The fans will hate it, kids will find it stupid, it's going directo to video. Who the hell would go and spend money on this thing?
Ray Park in a lynchpin role, you say?
|Maggot Brain |
Dude, look at that guy play by his own rules.
Oh man. This is just ... oh man.
So bad I couldn't look away, mainly cause I couldn't believe how much of a generic back alley this "other dimension" looked like. And while we're on the subject, how does a fighter play by his own rules? Seems to me all he did was use a sword... which everyone else did ten seconds later.
Typical SNK. Always competing with Street Fighter.
|Hugo Gorilla |
Maggie Q in the role of Mai Shiranui. That scrawny bitch has, at best, B-cups. Fuck this movie.
HE WILL DESTROY THE UNIVERSE WITH HIS GARBAGE BAG THROWING SKILL
|a flaming monkey |
This is what happens:
someone writes a generic martial arts screenplay about swords and apocalypse and junk that has nothing to do with King of Fighters -> a no name producer seeking moderate profit picks it up, evidently seeing some promise -> producer seeks to enhance promise by ripping off popular video game title and character names to increase recognition of the product -> a movie which is not King of Fighters but is still called King of Fighters emerges -> the controversy generates mild, persistent interest as fans of the game series, who know the movie will be crap, have to at least rent it to prove that it is indeed crap.
I have to believe this is the case, otherwise nothing in the world makes sense.
a flaming monkey
Still, if I was the director of this film, I'd probably insert Zangief as a cameo--just to confuse everyone. First I'd make it clear that he is indeed Zangief, by interrupting the plot with HERE COMES A NEW CHALLENGER, followed by a soundbite of Zangief's recogisable lariat grunt. When 'Zangief' appears onscreen however, he'd be a 5 foot tall janitor with smallpox scars who says 'bolshoy tavieda' with a Jamaican accent and then attacks people with a mop.
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