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Desc:The highly-anticipated Nicolas Cage autobiography we've all been anticipating!
Category:Classic Movies
Tags:Disney, Nicolas Cage, Jerry Bruckheimer, the sorcerers apprentice, The Wicker Man reference
Submitted:Anonymous
Date:12/10/09
Views:1190
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Comment count is 21
Riskbreaker - 2009-12-10
I only have one question:

howidgetburn?
GlennFinito - 2009-12-11
Fireball! (Throws tennisball)
Fireball! (Throws tennisball)
Fireball! (Throws tennisball)

magnesium - 2009-12-10
Another movie ruined by Nicolas Cage's awful hair.

So is Bruckheimer just going to make movies based on various titles and phrases associated with Disney from now on?
Jefka - 2009-12-11
I'm more bothered by the weird pedo vibe from the presumed plot. Like that pbf comic:

http://pbfcomics.com/?cid=PBF211-Atlantis.jpg

kingarthur - 2009-12-11
Frightening, but I kind of look forward to Mr. Toad's Wild Ride.

Xenocide - 2009-12-11
COMING SOON:

NICHOLAS CAGE IS A SINGING DUTCH BOY IN:

IT'S A SMALL WORLD


NICHOLAS CAGE IS THE HIPPO, AND ALSO THE GUY WHO SHOOTS AT THE HIPPO IN:

JUNGLE CRUISE

NICHOLAS CAGE IS BARACK OBAMA, GROVER CLEVELAND, AND MARY TODD LINCOLN IN:

THE HALL OF PRESIDENTS

NICHOLAS CAGE IS TEDIOUS IN:

THE 70 MINUTE LINE


NICHOLAS CAGE IS A GODDAMN MOUNTAIN IN SPACE EVEN THOUGH THAT MAKES NO SENSE IN:

SPACE MOUNTAIN


NICHOLAS CAGE IS THE FUN AND EXCITEMENT OF FLYING DELTA AIRLINES IN:

THAT ONE RIDE SPONSORED BY DELTA AIRLINES THAT NOBODY LIKES


SEE ALL SIX FILMS, GET FREE LARGE POPCORN TOPPED WITH YOUR GODDAMN HONEY.

Cleaner82 - 2009-12-12
Mmmm. Goddamn honey corn.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2009-12-12
I just wanted to say I love Xenocide.

Big Muddy - 2009-12-11
Liquorman
moldprince - 2009-12-11
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NEXG8Pt0PI4

Ferrari accident on the set. They clipped a lightpole that landed on some dude's leg, but THANKFULLY the Sbarro looks unharmed.


kingofthenothing - 2009-12-11
I thought this was some Harry Potter mashup video, until it slowly dawned on me that "No, this is an actual thing. This is an actual thing somebody is doing."
StanleyPain - 2009-12-11
At this point I think it would take gay porn or something along those lines to sufficiently kill Cage's career.
Cleaner82 - 2009-12-12
It's a close call but I think Nicholas Cage in the world is a net gain.

Xenocide - 2009-12-11
Well at least they didn't try to jam in a scene where a bunch of marching brooms flood the placeOH FUCK MY GOAT THEY DID.
poorwill - 2009-12-11
A Dr Strange movie with this budget, using Ditko's art as a reference and no Nicolas Cage whatsoever ... that would be cool.
Cleaner82 - 2009-12-12
Eenie meenie miney MAAAGIC!!! *green lightning*

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2009-12-11
This is not your father's Sorcerer's Apprentice. This time, it's personal.

Starring: Nicholas Cage reading off of cue cards

Coming soon: Sorcerer's Apprentice: the Book on Tape

This is not your father's Sorcerer's Apprentice Book on Tape. This time

(jamming music)


Hay Belly - 2009-12-11
With a name like Turteltaub, how can it fail?

ps I want to have your babby Xeno
memedumpster - 2009-12-11
Five for awful. I can't believe they couldn't find a precocious eight year old to be the apprentice.
Camonk - 2009-12-11
Oh well.
Riskbreaker - 2009-12-12
They still haven't done the third national treasure movie right? Just a matter of time.
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