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Desc:'Hey guys, is that doug getting ready to jump into that pool? I'm gonna break his neck!!'
Category:Sports
Tags:Ouch, Dude you ok?, broken face, russians?
Submitted:Frank Rizzo
Date:01/02/10
Views:3614
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Resubmit:Time Travel Mishap
Resubmit:The Mothership

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Comment count is 35
Time Travel Mishap
This is the kind of video that you could explain in perfect detail to somebody and when they saw it it would still come as a shock.
gmol
I've met a number of Russians, and I believe I now understand that a number of common traits which I could observe in their personalities and general disposition are not in fact inherent, but indeed simply a result of survivor bias.
baleen
survivorship bias


Definition
The tendency for failed companies to be excluded from performance studies due to the fact that they no longer exist. Survivorship bias causes the results of some studies to skew higher because only companies which were successful enough to survive until the end of the period are included. Similarly, mutual fund performance may be misleading due to survivorship bias if the fund family tends to merge or discontinue underperforming funds.


Can you explain what you mean.

baleen

because they survived you only meet the assholes that killed the losers? is that it?

pastorofmuppets
Bears. Bears killed the losers.

gmol
baleen, if you need it spelled out:

You might want to believe that Russians are, by nature, stoic almost cynical people how have trouble getting excited about things like that are inherently happy. I am talking about things like green tea ice cream cake, They Might Be Giants and kittens. Now, not everyone likes those things, but bringing in a green tea ice cream cake into your office is bound to make at least a few people happy. We may observe though, more often than we would expect by chance alone, that your Russian co worker may have trouble even cracking a smile in the presence of a slice of said cake. You might think that the underlying mechanism behind this expectation is due to the genetic variance between Russians and populations of other countries, or the Lamarckian effects of Communism. You might think that.

The seminal result that I have laid out in my previous post is that Russian citizens may not predisposed to be indifferent to happy things, but every Russian one tends to meet outside of Russia is one that has had the fortitude to survive through the situations like we've seen in the video above. Everyone else that was part of the normal distribution was killed by having their neck broken by their friend. Even if they lived, most normal people succumbed to the tissue damage induced by drinking a liter of sub zero chilled vodka. And even if *they* survived after that, the alcohol poisoning that followed would surely take them.

The Russians you and I meet are the ones that are alive after those experiences. I think this may be the reason that it is difficult to catch a Russian smiling. It's not a matter of *being* Russian, it's a matter of being alive after growing up in Russia.

Make sense?

The Townleybomb
I am so ashamed of both of you.

Charles
I am satisfied with your thesis, sir.

pastorofmuppets
Green tea ice cream is one of those things that sounds good on paper but hasn't really been made practical yet.

Desidiosus
Simpler explanation: vodka. Lots of vodka.

a flaming monkey
maybe the Russians you've met just didn't like you.

Camonk
Gmol and Glennorglennda should get together and just write stupid, spazzy, hundred page long posts together. It'd be AWESOME.

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
oh my
memedumpster
Jesus fuck, what an asshole.
The Townleybomb
Seriously, you shouldn't kick a guy in the butt after he's pulled a classic prank like that. That's not how they roll at SPORTKOMPLEKS.

duck&cover
Hey his friend knew that guy had just eaten a heavy meal and it hadn't been an hour yet.
manning_krull
He knocked him blurry!
Toenails
SO DOES HE JUMP IN THE POOL OR NOT????
kamlem
Perfect headfirst dive into the pool, and no splash! 10 points from me.
kamlem
Also, I'm pretty sure the guy that kicks the "pusher" can be seen limping in the background at the end of the clip...

kiint
dirty speedos, an old white t-shirt, black socks and shoes, and a hat

wtf russia?
jangbones
don't forget the hair

Charles
I wasn't even sure he had on anything under there, until *it* happened

Smellvin
Isn't it usually only the fat kids who wear a shirt in the pool?
pineapplejuicer
my uncle wrote a book about fly fishing in russia that was really him chronicling russian culture in the years after the fall of the USSR. one of the passages i always remembered was him describing the fact that vodka bottles in remote areas didn't come with caps, but rather with foil seals implying that the bottle was to be finished once the top was peeled.

this made me think of that.
pineapplejuicer
also, if you can pause at :25-:26 it looks like his feet hit the back of his head.

Billie_Joe_Buttfuck
naw, he avoided that thanks to the pool

THA SUGAH RAIN
That is a really strange place for a pool.
FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown
Lesson: If you wear a comically-overlong white t-shirt as a mini-dress: You. Will. Pay.
RockBolt
This really needs slowmo, I am having a hard time figuring out how his head is still attached
Syd Midnight
Didja ever notice how if you loosen up with a few drinks before driving, you don't get nearly as injured as the people in the car that you hit? I think it's kinda like that. Vodka is basically Hit Points in a Bottle.

Louis Armstrong
Can't wait until they prank someone to death with a tire iron.
kingarthur
I love how it slowly dawns on the prankster that he's done something socially unacceptable.
Caminante Nocturno
There is a moment where he's clearly thinking "Why isn't anyone else laughing?"

a flaming monkey
the pantsless guy drew quite a crowd.
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