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Desc:This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Mass Effect 2.
Category:Video Games, Humor
Tags:zero punctuation, Yahtzee, escapist, mass effect 2
Submitted:Caminante Nocturno
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Comment count is 20
If I wanted to survey resources in pretend outer space Id play EVE Online.
Yeah, but does EVE online have Commander Gobblecock (she's the one who's always being forgotten)?

commander gobblecock is not a female

... I liked surveying planets.
...wait. His criteria for good games is writing? He doesn't enjoy playing multiplayer in multiplayer heavy games? Why is he reviewing games? Fuck it. Five.
His criteria for good games changes all the time.

a flaming monkey
He has no criteria beyond wordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordwordswordswordswo rdswords

I thought his point was that if he were involved in producing a game, his job would probably be writing, so he'd rather work at Bioware because they respect good stories.

He is a fucking retard that knows shit about videogames at the end of the day.

Sometimes he occasionally says something funny.

So no vehicles at all? I thought it was fun being able to pick and choose when i wanted the game to be easy.

Drive around, shoot down some annoying sniper turrets, THEN get out and earn the actual xp by engaging them on foot. Or just shoot those giant motherfuckers until they have one point left and then get out of the vehicle and snipe them.
Don't format your hard drive anytime soon okay wink wink.

In all seriousness, I probably won't play ME2 because my 360 was stolen that had my ME1 character on it. :( And the fact that Bioware has gone along the lines of "All Evil Decisions Make You Ugly On The Outside."
There's an upgrade which can make you look normal no matter how evil of a bastard you are. But you'll have to play the aforementioned scanning game to get the resources for it.

I have to five this for the whole uncanny valley bit. Man, Bioware games can be unsettling to look at sometimes.
I haven't played either Mass Effect (really want to, though), but I have played other games, such as Fable, which have a "pick good or evil" mechanic in them.

I'm always disappointed that the games make a universal judgment on your actions as either good or evil. Everyone justifies things a little differently - what's good to one person may look evil to another.

How your main character feels about his/her actions is one thing - but every other character should form their own opinions of you based on what they know, how you justify yourself to them, and their own moral compass and points of view. Now that would be an awesome game.
A game where there is no exact "good or evi"l, just shades of gray. Stars for your comment.

If Bioware made a "The Black Company" game.

Planescape Torment's moral system was pretty cool. Back in the day.

In ME1 your choices were not so much good and evil but "unbearable pussy" and "total dickhead". I really loved ME1 and if I wasn't so cheap I would be playing ME2 right this moment.

take is right. the algorithm they used to judge a statement as "paragon" or "renegade" must have been coded by a nazi who is still recovering from a lobotomy because it never made a spit of sense

Iron Xides
The main lesson to take away from mass effect is that if you make a character empathetic and reasonable, then someone on the internet is going to call him a pussy.

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