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Desc:I wouldn't lie to you, I've never lied to you. This is from Jesus. [Speaks in tongues.]
Category:Religious, Educational
Tags:Jesus, prophecy, Speaking in Tongues, bamboorules
Submitted:lucienpsinger
Date:04/28/10
Views:1555
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Comment count is 30
Hailey2006
1993 called, they want their hair back!
lucienpsinger
I was pretty sure I'd find something good if I typed "I sure do love Jesus" into YouTube search, but DAMN.
Toenails
I can't decide if this child's addicted to all the attention he's getting, or if he's just a few brain-chemicals shy of a lucid thought.

My inner Bill Frist tells me that he's a narcissist who claims Jesus speaks through him because he feels people will hang on his every word.

But what the fuck do I know? It's not like I have Jesus around to fill in the blanks for me.
SteamPoweredKleenex
Nor does anyone else, there being no evidence to the contrary.

Syd Midnight
I think it starts as one and becomes the other. You should be suspicious of any church that encourages someone who is rolling around on the floor spasming and screaming gibberish, instead of dialing 911 or calling their parents to the nursery to calm them down. Eventually they start worshiping epileptics.

EnochEmery
Why was he praying in Klingon at the end?
manfred
Don't copy what I'm saying!
Riskbreaker
This is actually a deleted scene from Terminator 2.
urbanelf
Come with me if you want to live...

... forever in Heaven with my Father!!!

ZING!

SixDigitDebt
Klaatu....
Xero
...barada...


Hooper_X
NiCOUGH COUGH COUGH COUGH

....

There. I said it. I said your damn words!

Camonk
Well, maybe not every little syllable...

memedumpster
It is fun to read the Bible while high and all, but come on.
Kieran27
Oh yes, we shall have much from this one...

Seriously though, I don't understand the whole praying in tongues thing. Sometimes making nonsense noises is good (like I guess this was) and other times it's bad (for supposed possession and such) In either case, all it seems to be is random sounds strung together without thought, and somehow that makes it special.

Does anyone know why it's supposed to be special? Really, I'd love to know.
dueserpenti
Speaking in tongues happens when you're possessed by the Holy Spirit. God is speaking through you in the original language which everyone spoke before the Tower of Babel business, or something. Why God would want to speak to you in a language you don't understand is unclear, as is the reason the language isn't consistent from possession to possession. Whatever God's reasons, speaking in tongues offers the social cachet of a direct personal line to God without the responsibilities that might come with it if you were given a message you could interpret.

StanleyPain
Biblically, people who "spoke in tongues" were assumed to be possessed by the spirit of the lord or a saint who was talking through them in a language the actual person couldn't possible understand, thus proof that the person was blessed and not just batshit insane.
Somewhere a long the line, talking in complete bullshit nonsense became an acceptable substitute for ACTUAL speaking in tongues. I think it began with American evangelicalism sometime.

StanleyPain
Whoa...we must have posted at the exact same time.

pastorofmuppets
My pet theory has been that it's about seeing what people are and aren't willing to do in terms of ridiculousness. If you hold back when it comes time to speak in tongues, then you aren't "strong in the faith." And, of course, if you are "strong in the faith" then you can lord that over people, so it is very convenient in that sense.

pastorofmuppets
Oh, you meant why do people do it at all. As usual, (1) SP beat me to it and (2) because they have misread the Bible.

eatenmyeyes
Kieran
So, there's this book called Snow Crash...

Syd Midnight
It's working yourself into a mild seizure. It's probably the biggest thrill they get. Imagine some kid spazzing out at a rock concert, time 1000x.

That's one reason they hate rock music, astronomy, drugs, etc. anything that gives one as spiritual or catrhartic an experience as pitching a fit for a supportive crowd.

This is the only way they're allowed to get a buzz.

Rev. Blackson Pollock
The impression I got from the phrase "speaking in tongues" didn't mean babbling in gobbledy gook but actually having the "gift" of speaking any language in order to spread your message to people who don't speak the same language as you. I used to hate pentecostals, now I just pity them.

Bort
"Speaking in tongues" was originally being able to communicate in all languages at once -- a bona fide miracle that not even James Randi could duplicate -- but since genuine productive miracles are hard to come by, folks settle for any old brain defect. They're just looking for a sign that the Holy Spirit is showing up and making his presence known for once.

phalsebob
I got a message from Jesus once too-

Dear Ace,

You wouldn't believe how much fun I'm having here. The beach is so beautiful I could eat it with a spoon, and the pool has a bar that serves drinks the size of my face! I got a present for you, you'll never guess what it is. Also, repent and come to the Father through Me.

Wish you were here,

J
StanleyPain
A young Val Kilmer...
poetry publishing guide
Seeing the preview image and reading the description for his videos makes me think of poeTV fave Harriet the Turtle.

TeenerTot
This kid is fast becoming my favorite PoETV exhibit.
urbanelf
Esei karto gorodte esei karto gorode esei gorodokate goroda esei.
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