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Desc:oh my god
Category:Educational, Crime
Tags:valve, steam, FUCKING DUMBEST FUCK IN ALL OF CREATION AGHAHGAHGA
Submitted:detc
Date:05/14/10
Views:2889
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Comment count is 33
BorrowedSolution
Steam is a horribly unstable piece of shit, to be sure. -1 star for all of his moaning about having to OMFG change the startup settings for Steam and oh noez Portal ruins my display settings woo-woo-woo I'm sure there's no simple solution for this problem.

Although, it IS a Mac, so there probably isn't a simple solution.
splatterbabble
I'm running Steam on Mac, Win XP, and Linux (in WINE), and it's all exactly the same. This guy's just a whiny idiot.

Believe me, it takes one to know one.

Oh, and now that I have Steam on the Mac, I doubt I'll use the XP machine for much beyond the Federal crap I use that demands IE.

Volbard
Does he mention torchlight? I couldn't make it past :30
Severian
Ha ha he's retarded.

SteamPoweredKleenex
Yeah, that was established with his first line:

"Today, we're playing Steam."

That's nice. I'm going to go play Firefox. I love that game.

Reipuman
A WEBSITE INSIDE AN APPLICATION
YOU KNOW, LIKE iTUNES STORE

Reipuman
okay well Valve will just take it back then
sorry to inconvenience you, Mac people
theSnake
HAHA YES. Nice job Valve, you brought PC gaming to the Mac world, and they couldn't figure out how to even download the game and update their video driver. You now have a completely new user base of computer illiterate hipsters, Pandoras Box is opened, and then dashed onto the rocks for good measure.
MaulLove
Five stars for this comment.

And for justinsbigidea's pride at being a helpless moron.

splatterbabble
I've said it before and I'll say it again, there's two types of Mac users: the serious user that needs a stable platform for A/V composition and programming, and the totally inept that use Mac because Windows is too hard.

mashedtater
that had a pretty poetic quality to the comment thesnake. A

Riskbreaker
I almost want to retract every single bad comment i said about invisiblecrane. This guy is an idiot on proportions that only a math expert could figure out.
MaulLove
I've never seen anyone so meticulously document their own learning disability. Kudos to justinsbigidea.
SteamPoweredKleenex
I like how his ineptitude even has its own theme song. He must be really proud of his work.

And don't miss the YouTube comments. I think nearly all of them include the words "dumbass" and "retard" in one form or another.

nemeses9
So wait, this isn't satire/trolling?
Scynne
I don't think so, sadly.


sosage
They expect me to play video games on my one button mouse? Fuck this shit I am going back Final Cut Pro to edit some footage I shot of my beard, splice in a chick squirming on the floor and Pac-Man.
Dicknuts
snexwang
6 minutes ago

You ought to shave that beard and grow your hair out. It's really not a great look for a woman.
SteamPoweredKleenex
"I'm dying from all these updates."

There, there, little hipster. Just because your graphics card has never been asked to do more than display streaming pr0n, that's no reason to be a whiner.

"Steam does not deserve to start when my computer starts."

Because unclicking a box to turn that off is too hard?

"It takes over my graphics card settings."

Have you ever played any games before?

"It don't work."

User error. Replace user and press any key.
Camonk
Oh man, you and theSnake are really gonna get an earful from fat cunts about calling everybody hipsters. Watch yourselves!

PS: Can't stand this guy. 2 minutes is my limit apparently.

fluffy
"I just want to play my free game, how dare they try to advertise other games I might want to play"
bopeton
You should probably make sure you have a video card good enough to run Portal...
FABIO
So the awful new Steam interface was made for these people?
Caminante Nocturno
This guy's incompetence is a big deal.
oddeye
5 stars for actually making me side with Chet, Steam et al.

TF2 still sucks my balls, hard.
ztc
THE DEVELOPERS HAVE TAKEN OVER MY VIDEO CARD
oddeye
I'll be honest with you, I didn't even know macs had video cards.

Reipuman
Just today my instructor blew most of the first day of a weekly, half-term class evangelizing for the platform.
He literally said Macs had a 10-15% worldwide market share and have never had any viruses.

I even like OS X but goddamn does the cult do its best to change my mind.

zerobackup
I can't watch more than 2 minutes of this guy. Ugh.
memedumpster
What the hell, is his Mac a quantum computer that normally downloads a 4Gb game instantly? I'm a big pusstard about downloading stuff like this too, but come on, it wasn't that hard. Also, that "updating" took like four seconds. It actually worked with far less hassle than I normally accept from programs.

It never occurred to me to try Steam on my Mac, I was too busy flipping the hell out about how awesome free drugs are. Thanks, Valve! It seems like it would just be like a giant widget.
John Holmes Motherfucker
I like watching this guy, I think he's funny. But after six minutes, I should have some vague idea of what the fuck "Steam" is! Is it a game? A website? A download manager? I honestly don't have a clue, and I don't know if he does, either.
Wombles
Steam is stupid, and this guy is substantially stupider.

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