A twist worthy of M Night Shyamalan.
The Dick Wolf
"We were gonna get some heroin, but my drug dealer friend OD'd on her whole supply. Sorry, guys."
Actually, if I remember correctly, the O.D'ed woman is the two teenagers' estranged mother. The "surprise" was going to be their reunion.
Oh, well, that actually puts a really depressing spin on the whole thing. I didn't understand that.
He never told them.
|The Mothership |
We's goin' Sizzler, We's goin' Sizzler!
Yes, please cancel the original Law and Order, and not SVU, which occasionally gives shows like CSI Miami a quiet dignity.
There's the perp! He's outside!
Wait, I don't know what that is. I know it will kill the mood, but can you spit out a breathless, tough-guy explanation of it?
Look, rookie: outside is where the sun and moon hang out and drink their vodka tonics. The ancient Sumerians used to pray to a god whose name roughly translates as "protector of open space." The easiest way to get there is to open a door marked exit. Now hurry!
|Caminante Nocturno |
The Wire could learn a thing or two from this show.
If it were still running, I mean.
Oh man, they're going to feel let down when they get their food, and find out their mother died.
Can't wait for that lobsteritas tag to be activated.
I can relate here, my Dad took me out to a night at Applebees the day my close cousin died of a cocaine OD. Because of this I can only relate personal tragedy to queso dip and chips.
|MacGyver Style Bomb |
Who needs context anyway?
There is nothing more awkward and uncomfortable than being a native New Englander visiting another region and having your local host act like Red Lobster is a real treat.
Ever been to Legal Seafood? It's wicked good! Now let me take another sip from my Samuel Adams.
I cannot help but think that Black Belt Jones would have handled this with more panache.
And McDonalds. Definitely more McDonalds.
|Rodents of Unusual Size |
So, what was his surprise? Was he going to give them drugs? Because that would be hilarious.
You could have at least checked her vitals before you called-in the bad news, Ice.
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