|Tuan Jim |
You must collect the other six if you hope to rescue the princess.
"The cave's largest crystal found to date is 11 m (36 ft) in length, 4 m (13 ft) in diameter and 55 tons in weight."
|Scrotum H. Vainglorious |
Fucking amazing and to think it was only discovered just 10 years ago.
|The Mothership |
This must be the same one that National Geographic reported on a couple years back. I remember they said it was hot as fuck inside, so hot that you could only stay in there for like 15 minutes at a time. Very cool indeed.
It's not so much the heat that only allowed 15 minutes, it's the humidity. It's so dense that essentially your lungs begin to form condensation and you fill up with water.
Welp, there goes Superman's solitude.
What the... they're touching the crystals with bare skin. I was taught to never do that when spelunking; the oils on our skins both impede the formation of cave features (such as crystals) as well as actually destroying the feature if it accumulates enough oil.
Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Well they're going to re-flood the cave so they might as well get some crystal fondling while they still can.
I can't decide on a single nerd joke to make about crystals, so I'll just say "fuck this is amazing."
Think of how much money you could make charging new-age hippies to go down into "The Cave Of Giant Healing Crystals!"
"The healing mineral vapors building up in your lungs tell you it works!"
Geology porn. Notice Tono touching his crotch towards the end.
I'd compare this to some lame fantasy or sci-fi movie, but that would take away the majesty of this actually existing on our planet.
Every now and then, Mother Nature says "oh, you think what you little apes are doing is amazing? Look at THAT. Yeah, that's what I thought."
to give the little half-monkies some credit, they can do some amazing shit on this kind of time scale.
I especially liked running across this tidbit about the cave:
"..one of the workers, with the intention of stealing crystals, managed to get in through a narrow hole. He tried to take some plastic bags filled with fresh air inside, but the strategy didn't work. He lost consciousness and later was found thoroughly baked. "
|Wheelie McJesus |
There you will find a yeti.
|Jet Bin Fever |
Behold! The Glittering Caves of Aglarond
ON THE NEXT GERALDO, WE UNCOVER THE SECRETS OF SUPERMAN'S PORN STASH.
He needs some cat crap for that lens.
They've discovered the ancient ruins of a sci-fi movie set!
So what will the asinine, clickbait lead-in for this video be once it's ripped and uploaded to a dozen viral Youtube accounts?
My guess: "This group found a cavern in Mexico. But what they discovered next made my jaw drop! Wow, it's beautiful!"
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