|asian hick |
how is that even possible? they'll take ANYONE (except homosexuals)
You could argue that part of this is because the age when the military attracted our best and brightest is long gone. This era of perpetual war has made it so smart kids are a hell of a lot less likely to enlist than they used to, leaving the military left with the dregs.
But on the other hand, nowadays we got video games and you know, cell phones.
|Syd Midnight |
Such a shock that they're having a tough time convincing the smart kids to volunteer to go step on IEDs in Afghanistan so we can officially finish losing another bullshit Bush war.
America too fat to wage wars of aggression?
Shit, every cloud really does have a silver lining.
How is it they haven't invented sand tires for Jazzys yet?
Throw in Tank treads & a flamethrower/bagel warmer, then I'm in.
Seriously, baby boomers, assume some goddamn responsibility for once in your lives. If the wars you started are so damn important, why don't you fight them?
That's some great ranting, but I'm pretty sure that gamers tend to be in better physical (if worse emotional) shape than their reality-dwelling counterparts...
Why in the fuck would you think that sitting in front of a monitor gets you in better shape that oh say walking?
This is all high-fructose corn syrup's fault.
Watch out that their parents don't get frozen in Carbonite and hung on the wall.
The oldest is ten & can't figure out a toaster oven.
When did Weird Al start teaching english?
A remake of Top Gun could fix this problem quickly.
|Caminante Nocturno |
The news is written exclusively for stupid old jerks.
This is the video game era, where I can can kill things and get my petty power rocks off without having to trudge halfway around the world, so fuck you Army!
Never fear, the US will want to turn this around as military supremacy is the last hope of empire for us and the way they'll do it will be through college tuition.
|Unmerciful Crushing Force |
Don't we have the Predator drones to make up for this?
|Dread Pirate Roberts |
My thought is: Recruit the physically unfit, then make them fit. After they sign up, they're yours. Make them run ten miles a day and I guarantee within a few months they'll be fighting soldiers. This video has the assumption that fat people stay fat. Not true.
it seems so obvious that one wonders why the army didnt think of it
The military used to have a kind of "fat camp" program for just this purpose. Basically an extra 4 months or so of pure weight loss PT to get fat recruits into shape before boot camp. Probably so people couldn't dodge the draft by eating themselves obese.
A few years ago they ended the program because people were joining the army, not to serve their country, but as a weight loss program. So these days they figure if you really want to be a soldier, you can lose weight on your own.
Additionally, no matter how much people run, it won't make them smarter.
So when the whole world gets fat, it will lead to world peace, and solve overpopulation. So let's drop Twinkies on the middle east.
|Scrotum H. Vainglorious |
Why not recruit the fatties and dummies as human shields or mine detonators?
|wtf japan |
I'm pretty sure my friends joined the military precisely because they played too many video games.
What if someone declared war on no one showed up because of Golden Corral's Tuesdays Half Price Bonanza every Tuesday from noon to six! Come on by today and eat some peace!
I knew a guy who was too thin to get into the army back in the mid 90s. He weighed 107lb and they had a 110lb minimum.
Me too, guy had a thyroid problem. All he ever wanted was to fight for his country like his dad, but they wouldn't take him. He's run marathons in almost every state of the nation, and he bikes and swims constantly. He scored a defence contracting gig recently with the air force, but it's like a silver medal to him. He's depressed about it.
Of everything in this video to obsess on, you people just glazed over General WILLIAM WALLACE?! For shame.
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