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Comment count is 52
Mike Tyson?! - 2010-11-27

Black people tag, quick!

SolRo - 2010-11-27

trampled fat guy: "Organs ruptured...bleeding internally...must. go. on... to buy. TV for.... less!"

simon666 - 2010-11-27

This tears me in two directions: 1. The cries of the trampled irk me, and I only want them to stop suffering; 2. All involved are contributing to a disgusting spectacle in which people are routinely trampled every year and I despise them for perpetuating this.

It's gross on many registers.

Anaxagoras - 2010-11-27

It's a representative sampling of America, so you could view it as a sociological study.

Charles - 2010-12-03

I would argue that this is not the best sample to represent all United States citizens.

kennydra - 2010-11-27

Is it wrong that I kinda wanna shoot up one of these black friday events? just put them all out of their fucking misery.

Ok. yeah. that is wrong.

but still. so sad. deeply sad on so many levels.

Pillager - 2010-11-28

Bullets are too good for them.

Molotovs are the way to go.

La Loco - 2010-11-28

Lots of terrorists in here be hatin'.

voodoo_pork - 2010-11-28

More like unmitigated, bilious disgust.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2010-11-30

I want to put all of the TV's in a giant trough full of candy and whoever eats their way to a heart attack first wins them.

phalsebob - 2010-11-27

Fuck I hate Christmas shopping.

Valvados - 2010-11-27

Informal tradition for the day after Thanksgiving: at 5:00, load up plates with leftovers and flip on the TV. Everybody tosses onto the coffee table and makes their best guess as to how many minutes that stories about people getting injured on Black Friday will take up on the 2-hour block of news. Closest without going over wins the pot.

Ocyrus - 2010-11-28

Oh, I like that... thanks, I'll be playing next year.

Old_Zircon - 2010-11-27

We're ALL Devo.

delicatessen - 2010-11-27

Those hover chairs from Wall-E will solve so many problems!

Old_Zircon - 2010-11-27

Oh yeah, "why the terrorists hate us" tag?

memedumpster - 2010-11-28

This is the PRIMARY REASON the terrorists hate us. This is the only video possible where if eighteen cops ran in and tazered everyone I would say "Oh thank you, God." Fuck it, needs a "why memedumpster hates us" tag. Sorry to vent on your comment, dude, I just hate me some Christmas.

phalsebob - 2010-11-28

"Why the terrorists pity us"

Riskbreaker - 2010-11-27

This is why you shop via the internet, FOOLS!

Toenails - 2010-11-27


This is what I say at my job. Only it's with little kids and when I catch them, I'll go ahead and take them back to the end of the line.

Anaxagoras - 2010-11-27

All of that applies to the security guards in this clip. Except for the "take them back to the end of the line" part. These guards still have much to learn about how to do their job properly.

K. Brass - 2010-11-27

The driving force behind the world's economy, folks. Well, for a few more years anyway.

paranex - 2010-11-28

Have some stars.

RomancingTrain - 2010-11-27

There's a clog in the garbage chute.

Enjoy - 2010-11-27

This was in North Buffalo.

Caminante Nocturno - 2010-11-28

If the roof collapsed and killed them all it would make the world a better place.

SolRo - 2010-11-28

there is something to be said about china's shitty construction standards.

these people would be killed, and the dirtbag that cut corners would be killed. Win-win.

fluffy - 2010-11-28

Christ. At least people stopped when people in front of them fell down, although that's tempered by them yelling at each other for being "ignorant fat fuckers" or whatever.

threads - 2010-11-28

Agree with poster, Devo was RIGHT!

SixDigitDebt - 2010-11-28

I hate being part of this species.

Udderdude - 2010-11-28

So this is like a map for left 4 dead, right?

TheQuakeSoldier - 2010-11-29

5 fuckin stars for you, sir.

BOOSH - 2010-11-28

Jesus Christ

As a Canadian, its even harder for me to take the usual snooty "Oh look, Americans" air due to the fact that this is Buffalo(which is basically Canada), and the large number of Tim Horton coffees people appear to be holding

The Faghorn - 2010-11-28

Buffalo is like Canada in the same way that the Little Matchstick Girl is like the happy family.

Ocyrus - 2010-11-28

No, Canada is basically Buffalo.

dead_cat - 2010-11-28

Holy shit

charmlessman - 2010-11-28

Isn't it about time we outlaw Black Friday?

Oh, that's right, free market, personal freedom, blah blah blah...

bakune young - 2010-11-28

this is me in this video im that first guy in the yellow coat

Embee - 2010-11-28

Yards ahead of everyone else with your amazing speed-walk

Big Muddy - 2010-11-28

Seeing all that sweaty fat girl cleavage makes it all worth it right?

boner - 2010-11-28

This is a trap, right? They're going to lock the doors and set the place on fire.

Ocyrus - 2010-11-28

So, let me get this straight... terrorists want to blow up Christmas Tree lightings, but can't do us all a favor and target Target/Walmart on Black Friday?
Proof that there really is no god.

Stopheles - 2010-11-28

Who here (besides me) assumes that at least half of the big-ticket purchases people were making were for themselves, not gifts for others?

Caminante Nocturno - 2010-11-28

I figured that was a given.

Xiphias - 2010-11-28


Johnny Madhouse - 2010-11-28

I like how the later people were smiling and waving at the camera. They had no idea that people had been trampled only a couple minutes before.

Mike Tyson?! - 2010-11-28

They knew, just didn't care.

Urist - 2010-11-28

They were the assholes that caused it. People pushing from the back of the line force the people in the front on top of one another.

Usually there is an excuse though, like a night club fire or something.. not AMAZING SALES.

Nikon - 2010-11-28

God damn it!
What the hell is wrong with people!?

Aubrey McFate - 2010-11-30

I've gone to a couple of black friday sales at a local Fry's (big computer electronics store). There was never this kind of craziness at either of them.

Part of me wants to say it's because nerds are calmer and more rational on the whole, but it's probably because this kind of athletic effort is beyond them.

Lurchi - 2010-12-02

The fattest, ugliest country in the history of the world.

MurgatroidMendelbaum - 2011-02-08

November 27th, 2008

There we were; the sentries. We, who had diligently risen at 3AM only to wait four hours in the bitter cold. We kept one another company that cold Autumn morning among our neighbors, telling stories, sharing laughs, even swapping our precious shopping strategies. Huddled together for warmth beneath that neon Kohl's sign, we stood as one against the darkness and the wind.
Then they came; the vultures. They who had slept in, and now gathered at the outset of the parking lot. No words exchanged between those faces, still flushed and warm from their car heaters. They had no loyalty to speak of, so much as a desire to elicit cooperation from their horde. They lacked our lust for life's adventures. Their only only common thought was to consume mindlessly, writhing together in that ever-growing mass just beyond the reaches of the light.
When the doors finally opened, our single-file phalanx fell quickly into chaos as we were overrun by their superior numbers. They pushed through, pretending to talk on their phones, convincing themselves that they were not to blame for the cries of the fallen. Their solidarity lasted only as far as the door, after which it was every-man-for-himself.
After those few, yet seemingly eternal moments of hardship, we too earned our way inside... only to discover that all was for naught. A storm of locusts summoned by Moses himself could not have picked the shelves any more bare. Yet suddenly, the world had found calm. For there they were, obediently lined up at the registers and well around the corners of the store like starving dogs, begging for permission to feed. The checkout lanes clogged, forcing their feeding frenzy to an abrupt halt. I took their frustration as an opening and struck.
"Look Wife, there's the lady who pretended not to notice our shouts as she shouldered us apart, shoving past our held hands. And Sister, can you see that girl there, who did not hesitate for a second to deliver The People's Elbow upon an elderly man for discount socks?" Their eyes widened in bewilderment as they cursed, whispered, and hissed under their breath. I went up and down the line, reflecting their sins back upon them like some medieval Jesuit priest.
None would drop out of line to follow or rebuke me, as I exited the store into fresh daylight and led my family toward a nearby Dairy Queen. Now as I remember that day I quickly grow tired, having developed a sense of pity for those poor creatures, as much a victim of their own avarice as anyone else. Perhaps someday, humanity will see the error of its ways. Or perhaps someday, I will invest in a Goddamned Taser. Either way, I intend for these folks to see the light.

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