How to touch a woman

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Comment count is 21

Supahfly

- 2011-04-27

Really? I usually just got straight for the vagina.

Bebido - 2011-04-27

You just got straight?

Supahfly - 2011-04-27

Yeah, what of it?

Innocent Bystander - 2011-04-27

got straight for the nookie.

straight for the nookie.

Bebido

- 2011-04-27

I couldn't finish this, too creepy.

Jet Bin Fever

- 2011-04-27

Note, do not actually try to touch an Asian. This woman is probably his sister.

Jellyneck

- 2011-04-27

but if you want to touch an asian, announce your intentions in terms of her CHI ENERGY to avoid any misunderstandings

hammsangwich

- 2011-04-27

Played a game whilst in Vegas one year called "touch an Asian". Basically you got a "point" if you touched anyone that looked Asian. You were supposed to be sneaky, but the more wasted we got, well, people were getting angry.

charmlessman

- 2011-04-27

He's played too many of those Hentai Flash games.

Grandmaster Funk

- 2011-04-27

"REALLY??"

That got 'really' gross, 'really' fast.

Kumquatxop

- 2011-04-27

the "REALLY" made me literally shout with laughter

delicatessen

- 2011-04-27

This is a weird ass standup routine.

delicatessen - 2011-04-27

Also her facial expression at 2:32

Oktay

- 2011-04-27

Her facial expressions all throughout! She's thinking "WTF? WTF? WTF? Remember to smile. WTF? WTF? WTF? Remember to smile. WTF? WTF? WTF?"

Also, the cut right after "This is the point where you can kiss her... or do whatever."

The Mothership

- 2011-04-27

"You want to control her body."

Macho Nacho - 2011-04-27

Remember, when talking about chi energy to a woman that you make sure to touch near her vagina, but don't actually touch her vagina.

Udderdude

- 2011-04-27

Step 2: Insert tab A into slot B.

Desidiosus

- 2011-04-27

REALLY??

mouser - 2011-04-27

"hey I noticed you have boobs!" Om nom nom nom...

Riskbreaker

- 2011-04-27

Geez, he's doing it all wrong! First he has to spread his arms in a 90 angle, then start flapping them while imitating the sound of a wounded gorilla. Then he has to spread his odor glands all over her face. Jesus, no wonder people don't get it!

kingofthenothing

- 2011-04-28

Nah, man, he's got to build a radionic box and dial in his sex appeal, plus throw a few orgone rocks around his dwelling. Then he's got to buy a servitor ring off Ebay with sexual domination in mind, rub himself with some Anna Riva "Bend Over" oil, and wear his Solomon Seal of Mars pendant and remember to charge his Tiger's Eye stone and program his quartz rock. After all that, he's got to build up his thoughtform powers to 99, and remember to bring his mp3 player with the voice recording, with the one track playing of his sexual subliminal messages on loop, to where the volume is at isn't at its lowest but still can't be heard. Then, just before he goes, he must meditate. Visualize. Attack. He is ready.

And later on when nothing happens he can record the whole thing in his journal and wonder what he could have done differently.

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