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Desc:Chubby McDivorce will fix everything!
Category:News & Politics, Accidents & Explosions
Tags:newt gingrich, election 2012, its okay his mom is dead now, reagan namedropping
Submitted:Xenocide
Date:05/11/11
Views:1076
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Comment count is 34
Stopheles
"Full employment" sounds a lot like socialism, Comrade.
cognitivedissonance
Ha ha, your best candidate is Newt Gingrich. Ha ha ha.
SteamPoweredKleenex
Sadly, he's not going to be the nominee. He's dropped into (I believe) fifth place among those who have announced or have exploratory committees.

Not that the rest of the GOP field isn't in some way batshit insane. Even if they don't buy their own moronic rhetoric, the fact that they have to spew such nonsense to appeal to the Tea Partiers pretty much clinches their failure in 2012.

IrishWhiskey
1) Polls this far out are fairly useless. And even reliable pools don't change the fact that in most Presidential primaries there are events that will fundamentally alter the race in ways that can't be predicted. It is only after that we frame events into an 'obvious' narrative.
2) Crazy shit in the primaries is often ignored. Presidential candidates in the general are known to completely reverse their positions, and the base they previously pandered to will march in step, now that they have an opponent they know is worse.
3) Yeah, you're probably right.

IrishWhiskey
pools = polls. I'd blame spellcheck, but really I need to start proofreading. I sent an email to a client yesterday that said "cock" instead of "lock". The context didn't help.


SteamPoweredKleenex
Crazy shit used to be ignored; if you look at actual bills being passed at the state and federal level, the crazy is now policy.

cognitivedissonance
Except that by April, 2007, Hilary and Obama were pretty much both in full fundraising gear. Romney has less than two million in the PAC right now, and he's a millionaire himself. Something is horribly wrong with this party.

jangbones
To review...the current field of declared and speculative Gop presidential candidates;

Bachmann (not pretty enough, gaffe-prone)
Cain (weird, black)
Daniels (unnoticeable)
Huckabee (not committed)
Huntsman (worked in Obama administration)
Palin (dumb, scandal-plagued, plummeting poll numbers)
Paul (too fringe, not Christian enough)
Pawlenty (dull, once supported cap-and-trade)
Romney (Mormon, Romneycare)
Santorum (dumb, worthless)
Trump (an army of skeletons in the closet, plummeting popularity)

...and now, The Marrying Man, who once had all the Republican support in the world and blew it, Newt.

I don't think it matters anyway, at this point the odds of anyone beating Obama are like ten to one, no matter who his opponent is. So, no one with any real ambition is going to join the fray until 2016.

Thus, one of the above people will almost certainly win the nomination. This election is going to be a landslide like 1984.

rustedmutt
So many delicious skeletons in that closet. I can't wait for 2012.
cognitivedissonance
As soon as we do what we ask them to do, KILL MEDICARE.

I'd be happy with a 20 year moratorium, frankly.

IrishWhiskey
"We need to work together, find solutions together,
and INSIST on imposing those solutions on those forces that don't want to change."
- So to be clear, when you say 'together', you only mean those people who think exactly like you, and everyone else will be dismissed or destroyed.

"There's some people who don't mind if America becomes a wreck, as long as THEY dominate the wreckage."
- So its not so much "Hope and Change" as "The 49% of Americans whose votes I don't need are treasonous scum."


The Mothership
This, this right here.

Rudy
GINGRICH 2012: LET'S DOMINATE THE WRECKAGE

I would actually consider voting for him if he took that tagline and ran with it.


Caminante Nocturno
When is this stupid generation going to start dying?
longwinded
I have bad news

TeenerTot
When they're just heads kept alive in jars, they will still have voting rights.

Aoi
I guess McDyingWifeDivorce was too ethnic for Ellis Island?
deadpan
Five stars because he looks like a tiny old Asian man in the preview image on the main POEtv page.
Binro the Heretic
Do you want to know this guy's idea of an ideal health care system?

It involves lying in a high-tech recliner in the comfort of your own home while your doctor remotely diagnoses your ailment from his own office.

I am not even making that up. He wrote about it in "To Renew America."

He also wrote about getting into politics when he was just a kid, I think he said he was about twelve years old.

There is something seriously wrong with that if it's true.
Pillager
Let's Romney will be blamed for Obamacare.

Pawlenty will be haunted for that bridge collapse.

Gingrich has mansions of skeletons, not just closets.

Palin's 15 minutes are up.

Who am I missing?


Anyhow, no matter what happens, Obama should have '12 in the bag.
John Holmes Motherfucker
>>Who am I missing?

RON PAUL! RON PAUL! RON PAUL! RON PAUL!


Seriously, this could be his year. He's polling well, and is considerably less loathesome than the others.

IrishWhiskey
Sure. And when he says "I support creationism and abortions, and oppose medicare and the military" he's sure to be swept in.


CIWB
Mitch Daniels and Jon Huntsman. One of these two will probably be the Republican nominee.

At least, they stand a better chance than Chubby McDivorce and Hairpiece McDumbass.

RomancingTrain
Herman Cain's pizza is shitty.

John Holmes Motherfucker
Hmmm. My Ron Paul comment doesn't seem as ironic as I intended.

kingarthur
Dear God, I hate this man.
The Mothership
No one person in the Oval Office can get this done. We 'Americans' *smirk*, are gonna have to talk together...

unlike the non-American in the Oval Office, right Newtie?
pastorofmuppets
The birthers just want to help Obama by showing that he is a beltway outsider.

oswaldtheluckyrabbit
HE'LL ALWAYS LOVE AMERICA, UNLESS IT GETS CANCER

VOTE GINGRICH 2012
oswaldtheluckyrabbit
stolen from Alex Knapp btw

joelkazoo
Give these stars to Alex when you see him, Os!

John Holmes Motherfucker
"Adding comments has been disabled for this video."
Ocyrus
Ha! You people act as if this has anything to do with participatory democracy. Fucking retards.
Enjoy the spectacle, ass clowns.
Jet Bin Fever
I'm glad he found a public domain midi to play in the background. That made it a lot more pleasant to the ears.
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