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Desc:This is the trailer they should have put out.
Category:Video Games, Horror
Tags:holy shit, What a mess, What kind of sick motherfucker picks up wet feces
Submitted:Harveyjames
Date:06/16/11
Views:1575
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Comment count is 26
MongoMcMichael
5:23 PRETORIUS!
deadpan
More like Dark Nukem Forever jesus christ you can't see anything in half those clips.
Udderdude
But it has Douk Vision!

potvin
Dear Developers,

Your normal maps don't fool me anymore.


Dib
I'm embarrassed for all of us.

H'uh! H'uh! H'uh! H'uh!
StanleyPain
Can someone explain to me what's so phenomenally bad about this? I just watched 10 minutes of average, if not mediocre, FPS gameplay.
Caminante Nocturno
1. It took over a decade to make.
2. Rape.

IrishWhiskey
0:03 - All it took.

It starts with FPS shooter finicky jumping onto dark platforms in a dark environment above instadeath while the character grunts each time. That's like asking players to remember a 26-character hexidecimal for save files when '0/O', 'S/5' and '1/l' are identical. Yes, games used to do it, but it's still a decision that shows complete laziness or contempt for the players, or both.


Supahfly
Does seem very easy too. AI were useless. But it might have been on the easiest settings.

Prickly Pete
Duke Nukem says, "I'm gonna kill you old style" in this game. It's true.
TheSupafly
So its basically Doom 3.
FABIO
More like Daikatana for a new generation.

You of all people should know this.

Harveyjames
Yeah, I get the impression that they'd have just about squeaked by if it'd come out around the same time as Doom 3. Doom 3 was a terrible game! But everyone gave it a free pass because it was sufficiently ahead of the curve, graphically.

I think the Duke Forever they had running on the quake engine, which looked a little like Half-Life, would have been a good game. It even had an AI female sidekick and, uh, a dynamic debris system where in-game hoboes could pick up the shards of boxes you'd shattered and beat you with them!

Udderdude
Doom 3 was a good game that could've been great with a bit more attention to monster usage, the expansion sucked though.

FABIO
Everything beyond the first half hour of Doom 3 was a tiresome slog. The ONLY reason I kept playing was everyone swearing that the hell level was the best level in a game ever.

It was pure torture getting there, and when I finally did, I found out it was just a shinier version of Undying's Onerus level that came 5 years earlier.

Caminante Nocturno
I would've forgiven Doom 3 of everything had they just let you use a flashlight and a gun at the same time.

Pillager
Did Gearbox make most of this shit or is this mainly 3DRealms' handiwork?


Wander
Gearbox is pretty competent, and have a functioning, if weak, sense of humor/ I'm gonna say they just sorta slapped together whatever was lying around, and not blame them for this awful shitty shitfest.

WHO WANTS DESSERT
In the first hour alone there's a parody of The Kramer. jokes about WMDs, and the Olsen twins being sluts. It really does feel like the writing was cobbled together from 15 years of script.

TSR
Disappointing lack of wallboobs.
twinkieafternoon
This really...isn't the impression I had when I played the original Duke Nukem for DOS.
MacGyver Style Bomb
Jump puzzles straight out of the original Half-Life.

Will wait for markdowns, such as when it's at Big Lots for five bucks.
deadpan
It really is amazing how you can date each gameplay section based on what then-popular game 3D Realms decided to rip off.
hammsangwich
I've been waiting 15 years for this game and if you think I'm not going to buy it just because it sucks, you're crazy!
Doomstein
That's the spirit! I'm going to think of this comment from now on whenever my grandma tells me that depressing story about how she had to eat her leather shoes to keep from starving during the great depression.

dairyqueenlatifah
"OH LORD ITS NOT MW2!!!!!"

-Every complaint about DNF I've read.
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