Terror babies need the most attention.
Gaping hole GAPING HOLE LOOK AT THE HOLE FILL THE HOLE
It's not that you speak with a Southern accent. It's that you say nothing but stupid things. The Southern accent is just context.
Help us fill the hole, Anderson.
Ugh, you KNOW that Texas lady moved the American flag pin to her upper right shoulder JUST so it was framed on the screen.
Gohmert has all the subtlety and panache of an injury lawyer on a local commercial.
AH DON'T HAYVE THA HARD EVO-DENCE RAGHT HERE IN FRONNA ME.
Well, why the hell not? Did you not know you were going to be interviewed today? I guess you just walked into your office and then the camera crew jumped out and yelled "SURPRISE!"
Cut the lady some slack; her skeleton is trying to break through her face.
The fact that people like this can get elected to positions of power proves that our system is pretty fucked.
Anderson Cooper is a fucking liar, Republicans DO NOT want to protect America. Where's your proof of that, Anderson Cooper? Where's your precious FBI agent now!?
"I brought it to the the attention of America for this reason: It was hear-... I'm a former judge, I knew it was hearsay coming from a lady who first brought it to my attention on the... she brought it to my attention on the airpla-... having flown together and she brought that to my attention while I was talking to the retired FBI agent about it and so having talked to him, no I didn't talk to them, because the point is when we did the research we found the hole existed!"
Seems pretty clear cut to me.
I think Gohmert realizes how profoundly stupid he sounds and for some reason he cannot back down; like a trapped rat he lashes out in every direction.
Terror babies have a right to life.
Terror babies are converting our children to homosexuality.
Terror babies are subverting our social programs.
Terror babies should never have been born.
I wish an anvil would drop out of the sky and land on the right side of the screen. Followed by him unfolding and only making cartoon accordian noises.
The NSA released guidelines recently on how to deal with a zombie outbreak. ZOMBIE TERROR BABIES!!
THAT EVIDENCE ENOUGH FOR YOU, ANDERSON?!?
Look at Screamy McBald before the interview starts. That guy is TERRIFIED. Maybe he's never been on national TV before and he just realized he's not as ready to be plucked from obscurity as he thought he was. Or maybe he's overcompensating for his nervousness by playing the victim game, except he jumps the gun here and starts claiming persecution before Anderson fucking does anything.
I mean sure, Bachman and Cain and Gingrich, and well, everyone on the right does the whole "OH NOES I'M BEING ATTACKED BY THE LIBERAL MEDIA" thing, but they at least wait for the media to say something about them first.
This idiot just sees a news camera and starts yelling hysterically about being persecuted for his accent. He's also completely incoherent, angry at everything, and blatantly stupid.
I am in AWE of this man. You couldn't find a more beautiful parody of the modern, proud-to-be-stupid-and-angry GOP if you tried. Someone get him to run for president.
BONUS FANTASY REBUTTAL:
"HAVE YOU LOOKED AT YOUR WEBSITE?"
"I'm surprised you can see my website from all the way up there on that cross."
|Fatback Jack |
They'll make your dreams come true
They'll do the same for you
|MacGyver Style Bomb |
Jim Henson's Terror Babies.
Also: the most classic stupid thing that birthers/tea partiers/creationists/religious people/whatever always fall back on
"My claims might not have much proof, but neither do yours!! I AM RIGHT BECAUSE OF THAT!"
I don't understand. What's the matter with the balding dude? Does he have some sort of medical condition?
this is really embarrassing
I can't tell any Republican woman apart from any other. I find them all not only identical but hideous.
This has made me gay. Seriously.
I can't stop fantasizing about being the cream in an Anderson Cooper/Dr. Drew Vienna Finger.
|Caminante Nocturno |
That man is a horrible, horrible clown who can't stop repeating the same awful jokes.
Wow, what a douche! He's an entertaining douche, tho.
"tell us what you think about the baby theory... I mean Mr. Gohmert's theory."
I remember when I saw this on the Daily Show segment "Jon Stewart and Anderson Cooper Look At Gaping Holes."
I had to burn my entire crop of terror babies before anyone else could catch wind of my plan.
|Big Muddy |
Wait, time to rethink my baby sleeper cell academy?
|The Mothership |
I'm not comparable to Winston Churchill.
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