Will always be the best batman.
Ketchup....catsup.....ketchup.....catsup. This is confusing.
Are you here to solve my ketchup problem?
I imagine this sort of thing happens to Batman a couple of times a week. There's a whole section in his crime files labeled "Stupid Guys Who Retired After I Punched Them Once."
Condiment King wasn't so bad, though. He had better puns than Captain Shaving Cream, plus his mustard gun actually worked, which is more than can be said for The Office Supply Sultan's paper clip cannon.
If he had done that to Rorschach he would have found himself at the bottom of an elevator shaft.
Here are a list of reasons why the new Batman movie will suck, all of which spring from the tragically short-sighted decision not to include the Condiment King:
1. There is no Condiment King
2. The Condiment King's role as a foil to the Dark Knight's singular focus on archetypal larger-than-life villains is missing, reducing his connection to the mundane villainy that permeates our own lives.
3. The movie's grim and gritty feel will overwhelm the audience.
4. The lack of marketable figures for young children, essential to building a franchise.
5. Neither Bane nor Raz Al-Ghul provide sufficient opportunity for puns. Catwoman will have to carry this on her own.
6. Bane is already supposed to release a horde of villains from Gothan to overwhelm the Dark Knight with his greatest enemies. With Two-Face and Joker already dead, and Scarecrow a joke, there's no one else introduced for him to fight. The Condiment King would have rectified this.
7. Both Raz and Bane are primary Batman villains known for defining and breaking him. We need a villain to show his everyday struggles, and denote a passage of time, or it won't pay off as an arc.
8. It is essential to the themes of the series that the poverty and despair of Gotham turn ordinary people into desperate criminals, who spiral out of control. This ties with earlier suggestions about how the Wayne parents as healers did more for the city than violence can. The Condiment King is that type of figure, whereas all the others are not.
9. Lack of cross-promotional fast-food product placement opportunities.
10. No opportunity to get Catwoman and Talia fighting while covered in BBQ sauce.
The rest have been included in my extensive letter to Christopher Nolan.
Worth noting: While Condiment King is great, they actually brought in Robin Williams to voice Crazy Quilt in the most recent series.
That was Jeffrey Tambor not Robin Williams.
This fight, silly as it is, was at least less embarrassing than Batman's encounter with the Condom King.
In the Batman universe, there's no way the drag queens in the red light district didn't dress up as costumed villains as an excuse to try and meet the Dark Knight.
For every actual crime, there had to be a dozen female stalkers and costumed queens who came up with their own theme to get his attention. And I very much doubt the Condom King would be the worst of them.
I thought this was pretty much the entire concept Frank Miller was running with in his interpretation of Catwoman.
I'm gotta say I'm a little disappointed this clip is cut so short. We miss out on the part where Batman tries to give him a break because "he's obviously new at this" and then The Condiment King makes him slip with his mustard gun.
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