THA SUGAH RAIN - 2009-07-29
Thank you for helping me feel better about never buying a wii, even when the girls were swinging their hips on it.
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spikestoyiu - 2009-07-30 Yeah, it's otherwise very difficult to find sexy videos of girls on the Internet.
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Caminante Nocturno - 2009-07-29
Yahtzee won't give bowling the time of day.
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Cleaner82 - 2009-07-30 If Yahtzee saw bowling on fire, he would not piss on bowling to put it out.
So great is his disdain for bowling.
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UnderANeonHalo - 2009-07-29
I'll give the Wii props for making a fairly fun bowling game. Am I buying one? No. I already own a bowling ball and the idea of sports without any actual exertion on my behalf is, well, sickening.
Now I'm going to go and play a cycling game with my recumbent bike, hope I don't accidentally burn a calorie!
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Ranma X. - 2009-07-30 Hey man, those pitchers of Coors Light ain't gonna carry themselves.... unless there's a waitress at the bar to do it for you while you throw your 10th straight 8 point frame.
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spikestoyiu - 2009-07-30 A 0 system to poorly replicate something that you can do very easily and fairly cheaply "IRL?" Nah.
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Riskbreaker - 2009-07-29
It's funny because it's true.
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Billie_Joe_Buttfuck - 2009-07-29
"Je suis la twat"
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Pillager - 2009-07-30
He's still got it.
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FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
Has he ever actually articulated his hatred for the Wii in some way that makes sense?
All I gather is that there are these people called "casual gamers" and nobody should be making games for them because...?
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Tuan Jim - 2009-07-30 He articulated it just as Ranma said in the vid, which you don't seem to have watched.
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Hooker - 2009-07-30 The Wii strikes me as the Perfect Strangers of video games. Lots of people eat it up, but it's still an endless supply of garbage.
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FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30 "For this argument to work, you have to believe that if the companies behind Cereal Mascot Racing and Family Minigame Jamboree 5 were developing for a console without waggle, they'd have each cranked out the next Portal by now"
Exactly. If you come out and say "Okay, no more shallow, family-friendly bowling games" (or whatever), the money currently being made off those doesn't magically get diverted to Final Fantasy XXXXVII or whatever because "games is games." Instead of whatever types of games Yahtzee likes getting a bigger piece of the industry pie, they just end up with the same size slice of an overall smaller pie. Nobody wins anything in that case.
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FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30
"One is that he feels motion controls in general, an on the Wii in particular, suffer from lacking any sort of tactile feedback. While you can see or hear what happens, any immersion gained from the controls is lost without such feedback."
How is that different from a gamepad/keyboard/mouse? And is "tactile feedback facilitating greater immersion" even a goal of the Wii controls in the first place, or is the point more to get players moving something other than their thumbs for once? The Wii doesn't make ice cream, either.
"Two, the Wii's tendency to cater to shallow gameplay mechanics such as the Wii Sports is bad because it's a shortcut to making money"
So Risk is just a shortcut to making money because it isn't Axis and Allies and it's damaging the boardgame "medium?" This is moon man logic.
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FeeFiFoFoTheFifeFifeBrown - 2009-07-30 "As for the "shortcut to making money," keep in mind that us Wii owners already own half of the games this package has as they CAME WITH THE CONSOLE."
Rehashing an older game? WELL I NEVER
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Riskbreaker - 2009-07-30
I'm a purist/old cranky man regarding this whole motion controls thing. Not that i detest the idea of motion controls per se, but if it's not going to work well with the game, or not work well at all, then please don't bother. Just give me something to play with a regular control. Most companies see this as a big gimmick, and they don't bother to make the damn thing work properly.
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SkeletonMichelle - 2009-07-30
This was the funniest Yahtzee in a long time.
I disagree with his perspective on the Wii, though. There are some legitimately great games for it--not nearly enough, I agree, but some--such as No More Heroes and, in particular, Super Mario Galaxy, which do use the motion controls in minor but very enjoyable ways, so I wish that he and others didn't dismiss the Wii out of hand because of games like Wii Sports. I also wish that more games used the Wii's unique controls well--for me, Metroid Prime 3 was considerably better than its Gamecube predecessors, because I thought that Samus finally felt like Samus and not like Robocop, thanks in part to the control scheme--but the existence of games like Wii Sports and other wagglefests isn't the problem.
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SteamPoweredKleenex - 2009-07-30 "No More Heroes" was one of the better games, but it also highlighted some of the Wii's weak points:
1. Waggling the Wiimote for combos was a crap-shoot at best. It was very hard to tell when I was doing it properly and when the Wii decided I wasn't using enough wrist-action or whatever it was looking for.
2. The hardware limitations were really evident. All non-boss enemies were the same set of polygons and that "dark shadow" effect to hide the lack of processing power started to be quite tiresome.
3. I don't know if the Wii's setup is to blame per se, but how many random bonus attack-powerups have you received when you downed the last enemy and the game won't let you progress to the next section until it's finally worn off?
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Sputum - 2009-07-30 I didn't like no more heros. I really wanted to because I loved Killer 7.
It tried to do a whole bunch of different things (mostly things that other games had already done), but ended up doing them poorly.
- The Waggle controls pissed me off
- The working minigames got really annoying
- I have no idea why collecting all of the clothes is supposed to be fun, but it's not
- The drive-around-the-city thing was really poorly put together and altogether unnecessary
- Honestly, I feel like it was stylistically ugly and stupid
The one truely good game for the Wii is Smash Brothers Brawl, and that is definitely a "if you like that sort of thing" game.
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Big Beef Burritos Supreme - 2009-07-30
WII BOWLING!
oh fuck off
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Cleaner82 - 2009-07-30
I winced when I saw the title. I knew it was going to be painful, and was it ever.
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