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"Have your parents stopped beating you for the Lord? Kill them."
Wait... Santa Claus is a fictional character created by a soft drink company at a time when cocaine was actually part of the recipe. And he wants pot heads to quit it?
Ho ho ho. Remember kids: Snitches get stitches. Ho ho ho.
I my kids can rat me out for making funny smells in the bathroom, I'm fucked, and I don't even smoke pot.
I can picture this as a George Carlin skit called "Santa is a Goddamn Facist"