This is a wonderful/horrible metaphor for the overblown, embarrassing mess the FF franchise has become.
I have, actually. It's still awesome.
Best scene of best game.
I miss when FF games didn't have fancy cutscenes and graphics, and had to rely on things like story and gameplay.
On a sidenote: WTF, RPG developers? Why hasn't anyone made a battle system even half as good as Mario RPG? I'd kind of expected those timed hits and attacks that require inputs to catch on more, they make turn based games much more involved. Yet for some reason, each new FF has you controlling the party a little less than the last one, which they really ramped up with 12 and 13.
By 15 they'll just say fuck it and make a shitty 40 hour movie.
The Opera scene is extremely corny, but I still have it on my mp3 player, and it still brings tears to my eyes.
VI was the climax for me; I don't know if the series went down hill after that, or I just got old, or both. A friend of mine mentioned something about XIII the other day, and to my great shame, I realized I wasn't even aware they'd made an XI and XII.
I'm actually a little surprised they're still releasing these as games instead of movies. The last one I played was X, and that was like a twenty hour cutscene with five or ten minutes of game during the intermissions. It was a hell of a lot better than IX, I'll give it that, but there was no role-playing, and hardly any game.
12 was even worse, homer. The whole thing played kind of like an MMO. You only controlled one character at a time and everyone else ran off basic scrips and repetitive actions (so exactly like an MMO).
The game encouraged you to set up AI scripts (which they called Gambits) to make the party behave the way you wanted them to.You could organize Gambits by priority and so on, so a character would always heal the wounded first, before attacking the same enemy as the controlled character, and so on. As you played you got more slots to make more complex scripts as well as new target options from 'tactics stores' and chests.
And that's where it got fucked up. For one thing, you couldn't teach a mage to focus their healing efforts on the most wounded ally or the one currently being attacked until you popped open a treasure chest and got the idea to do so. And the other problem should be obvious: the fuirther you advance in the game and the more complex you make your scripts, the less you actually control the party.
In the ideal situation you'd even set up gambits for the main character, and basically just let the game take over once a fight started, because the parameters you set were way more accurate and reliable than your stupid human brain. By the end of the game, you literally didn't have shit to do.
The gambit system has it's flaws, but at least it's not the simpleminded fiasco that is the battle system of FF13, where you actually have an "auto-battle" option, and all the battles boil down to the same thing: knocking down the enemy. Something a game like Shadow Hearts Covenant did way better.
I don't care much for FFIX, a bit too easy challenge-wise.
|Sanest Man Alive |
When Nail Met Coffin
|Dirty Sanchez |
Some Youtube comments say that this plays when you ride a rare chocobo.
Jesus fucking christ, you really gotta be kidding.
|Sudan no1 |
"Gas em up with the greens and let 'em go"
If the rest of this game is this self-aware, it might be worth playing.
It probably isn't, though.
And yet, this is about 12 billion times BETTER than the fucking "rap" that has also in this game.
This wasn't working for me in the hopper, so I googled the title. When all I could find were Soundtrack videos, I gave up and clicked one, thinking "it's just a song. That can't be what's in the hopper..."
Then I hit play, and it was immediately obvious that yes, that is exactly what was in the hopper.
5 for that alone.
My fifteen year old self would have eaten this shit up.
He would have spent hours thinking up all kinds of bullshit excuses to try to silence that nagging voice of doubt in the back of his head, but he'd still eat it up.
|spiteful crow |
I've never even played any of these games and I still can't stop laughing at this for some reason.
Ever since the last boss in FFX they have had this stupid fad of experimenting with Death Metal. Then there was the Black Mages which was a rock band comprised of Square employees. Terrible.
Holy shit, I had to go look that up. Just... wow. 5 invisistars for you.
Oi! The Black Mages are above reproach, you. We don't speak ill of them in this household.
Believe it or not, the game isn't half bad.
It's worlds better than FFXIII, not that that's saying much.
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