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Desc:Unfortunately, Alfonso didn't do the Carlton Dance
Category:Classic TV Clips, News & Politics
Tags:conservative, Tea Party, carlton banks, right wing paranoia
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Comment count is 37
The Mothership
It's true, conservatism is like a rainbow; so many different beautiful colors.
A rainbow shoved back into a prism and returned to it's superior and purest color.

Double standard... if a black man is well educated, articulate, liberal, he's a hero like Obama. If he's well educated, articulate, and conservative he's an Uncle Tom. I'm sure you'd respect him more as a black man if he had a gold grill and a pimp cup full of purple drank.
'well educated conservative' is an oxymoron.

Just a bunch of idiots that barely got a 'C' in business school with a degree that's the educational equivalent of a 4 year olds coloring book. And one done so poorly that any normal parent would be worried that the child is retarded.

The Mothership
I have respect for anybody with a gold grill and a pimp cup full of purple drank, regardless of their skin color.

shouldn't you be watching the 10:00 KPTV news?

It's not really a double standard. If you understood the history of race or if you ever bothered studying African American history in this country you'd have some clue as to what you're talking about, but you haven't, so it's only so much more redneck banter.

When people like Carlton Banks and Herman Cain say that black people are brainwashed into voting Democratic, it's a bit like me saying that you are a stupid redneck that has had your stupid brain conditioned to believe what you believe. It's condescending when I say things like this to you, because it implies that Southern Coast Guard/rednecks are not able to make informed decisions about their political beliefs.

Now, I don't want to make this seem like a double standard. If black people are brainwashed, as Cain and Banks might say, than so are sheltered pseudo-patriots such as yourself. I would never make such an assertion though, because that would be a double standard.

Cena, there's a difference between being articulate and well spoken and sounding like a pompous asshole. Being the latter, I thought you would be able to easily tell the difference.

Even if he didn't speak this way, his course would be pretty silly just at it is now. The only thing his ridiculous voice is doing is drawing more attention towards the crazy alternate reality you conservatives insist on building for yourself.

It goes both ways really. I can't tell you how many conservatives pointed to the one black guy in the Tea Party and said that proved there were no racist teabaggers.

Having that fake ass sounding "do take Bambi's furs to the cleaners and watch out for roughians" rich cliche' accent is not articulate, it's stupid. The richest people in the world don't talk like that unless they're on Tiny Toons.

Cena, Herman Cain promoted an electric fence along the border (the reasons why that wouldn't work could go on for, well, the length of the border), blames the poor for not being rich, and promotes a 9-9-9 tax "plan" that shifts any tax burden away from capital gains (what sane people would call "income") squarely onto the shoulders of the working classes.

This is beside the point of him quoting Pokemon songs in his speeches.

If he's not an idiot who doesn't realize how nuts his policies are, then he's evil.

For a simpler version, Cena: I don't dislike Cain, Bachmann, etc. because they're conservative, black, female, or whatever other label you want to pull out of your ass. I dislike them because the policies (if they can articulate them) they put forth are pure lunacy.

Us so-called "liberals" aren't your problem; your problem is that once someone calls themselves "Republican," you tend to defend them to the hilt without looking very closely at what they're actually saying.

Actually I've been going to Tea Party forums. A lot of them think the GOP is corrupted because they're resorted to "affirmative action" in choosing Cain as a contender. Durrr.

Some of the people in the audience were laughing at him, unless I'm hearing shit again.

Many Republicans have seen enough television to know that something is seriously wrong here.

Void 71
The sockpuppet wins this exchange.

Steam, I was kidding when I called folks Racist for disliking Cain. I was just turning around the liberal mantra of "Conservatives hate Obama cause he's black" If you get a black candidate to say things rich white folks love then the rich white folks will love him.
Baleen, I wouldn't say minorities are brainwashed into voting democrat, but they do have a interdependence on each other.

You say that as if interdependence is an inherently bad thing. We're SUPPOSED to put people in office who do good for us, our community, and our country; and given sufficient numbers, Democrats serve the country well.

Pretentious is my favourite accent.
Robin Kestrel
He looks and sounds like Chappelle or Katt Williams doing the ironic "white folk sound like THIS" impression.

Really, he sounds like he is mocking them all. I keep waiting for him to break character.

Spit Spingola
I keep waiting for Ann Coulter to break character and she never does. I guess one way to get popular in right wing circles and make a lot of money selling books is to live your life as a constant caricature.

Spit Spingola
Five for me legitimately thinking this was some kind of bad comedy act thanks to him having a voice I'd only heard in cartoons. Apparently he always talks like that, which just perplexes me.
Ah, the fabled Mid-Atlantic accent, which exists only in Hollywood studio films of the 30s and 40s.

Seriously, it was invented by voice coaches to allow any actor to sound like a rich asshole. No one anywhere ever actually spoke like this guy.
Before this video, the only people I'd ever heard speak with this accent were cartoon characters. After this video, that remains true.

You forget the ever eloquent conservative intellectual Billy Buckley.


How can a country with so much power be so deeply divided?
You heard this line in a anime, didn't you?

Caminante Nocturno
Why must we fight?

We are not enemies!



bow tie = sincerity
Come on, this is so self-aware that it has to be a parody.
Abstract Fainter
My brain can not accept that this is not a parody.

Although he didn't mention Grey Poupon. That really plays to the Fox crowd.

Can't he just at some point break into a rousing verse of "Chocolate Rain?"
Hank Friendly
this is way more funny than it has any right to be
Jet Bin Fever
Makes me want to watch "Agent for H.A.R.M." again:


This part:

Rodents of Unusual Size
It's been made private. :(
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