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Desc:I pity his children.
Category:Religious, News & Politics
Tags:Love, Christian, christopher hitchens, <3, bryan fischer
Submitted:kamlem
Date:12/20/11
Views:2075
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Comment count is 23
Xenocide
I don't think Chris Hitchens hated or rejected Heaven anymore than I hate or reject the Mushroom Kingdom. You can't reject someplace you don't think is real.

Having said that, if both Heaven and the Mushroom Kingdom were real, I'd have a very difficult choice to make.
SteamPoweredKleenex
The Mushroom Kingdom could be fun, but if you planned on having sex in the afterlife, the Mushroom Kingdom would like to remind you that the only chick you've got a chance with is in yet another castle.

SixDigitDebt
Can't it be both?

Thank you Mario, but your god is in another castle.

Xenocide
Not true. There's also Rosalina and Daisy, both of which are hotter than Peach and never get kidnapped. You can find them down at the kart track most days.

Caminante Nocturno
If Equestria were a real place, I'd live there forever.

MongoMcMichael
Birdo gives me silver balls.

TeenerTot
So punchable.
SixDigitDebt
The mysterious motivations of imaginary people always bring a smile to my face.
takewithfood
You have to understand that we're still talking about the god who put the first two people he made in a garden with an apple they weren't allowed to eat, and a snake who god knew would get them to eat the apple. And despite knowing exactly how it would all play out, he was so enraged when the people he created to betray him betrayed him that he cursed the whole species, even the people who weren't even born yet and didn't do shit.

And he stayed angry for thousands of years before it even hit him that the ONE THING that would make him happy is to see his son get tortured to death. That made everything better, though if you don't go through the motions of agreeing that this happened, he'll still totally fuck you for eternity.

It's not like he closed hell or anything, he's still roasting all those people for the crime of having been born before Jesus Christ, along with the people who have the audacity to use the skepticism that he gave us to doubt the nearly incomprehensible instruction manual that we're supposed to take as truth because it straight-up says it's true right there in the first few pages.

Given that this is the god we're talking about, why should anything he does come as a surprise? Dude is fucking crazy.
pastorofmuppets
Forgiveness isn't loving... you heard it here first, folks.

pastorofmuppets
ack not a reply

Anaxagoras
Your understanding of Christianity is about as primitive and childish as Brian Fischer. Congratulations!

Anaxagoras
I'm sorry; that was unkind. You were probably just trying to make a joke, and Lord knows that's the perfect kind of joke to make when a clip features someone like Brian Fischer. I'm just a bit tired of smug ignorant atheists mocking a cartoon caricature of Christianity and thinking they're being clever.

takewithfood
Anaxagoras, if you have the time, please set me straight. I will remain a smug, ignorant atheist until someone tells me what I'm getting wrong.

Urkel Forever
His understanding of Christianity is, in broad outlines and minus the humorous way of expressing it, the understanding of it possessed by the vast majority of Christians now and in the past.

1. God created humans and by eating a mysterious fruit brought condemnation on themselves and all of their descendants.

2. A plan to escape this condemnation was concocted by God. It required that God's son (AKA God) would be horribly tortured and murdered. God chose to do it this way rather than say simply letting bygones be bygones.

3. But this type of escape is only available to those lucky enough to (a) be born after it happened, (b) believe points (1) and (2) and maybe a few more, and perhaps, if your sadism is now near satisfied, (c) be a good person where 'good' often involves things are manifestly not good.

If you want to retreat to some nice, sanitized version of Christianity where God actually loves us rather merely says so, be my guest. But don't pretend that it isn't a retreat.

SteamPoweredKleenex
It does still beg the question of why God had to sacrifice himself (in the form of Jesus) to himself (God) to change a rule that he (God) had made in the first place.

And it's not like this is Christian theology's biggest problem, but it does touch on another, which is its adherents believing that the Bible is somehow one continuous narrative when it was written by many different people and the books that make it up were voted on for inclusion. I mean, even the Gospels don't tell the same story, nor do they tell the similar parts in the same way, yet everyone thinks that the nativity is in each one, that the virgin birth is in each one, etc.

kingofthenothing
Just a heads up to the believers - read your own fucking book and you'll be just like the rest of us. Well, most of you will. Some of you are just going to stay broken. We'll deal with you when the time comes.

TheDevilsDictionary
Tee hee!
John Holmes Motherfucker
I am in hell.
Oscar Wildcat
Dude is making some excellent points, why all the hate? Would you want to spend eternity with this 'tard and some child fuckers with matching purses and slippers? Or drinking rum with Chris Hitchins and old Scratch? Hell is only hell for Christians, for the rest of us it's just more life you know?
pastorofmuppets
The old, "this is what you wanted, right?" is more of a genie / bitchy girlfriend tactic. Non-insane parents are only going to pull it when it comes to the kid turning down dinner or something similarly harmless.

With eternal torment it seems like someone should come down to read you your rights or something.
memedumpster
Not enough lions in Rome.
kingofthenothing
Amen to that.

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