Xenocide - 2012-01-13
You idiot. All you had to do was have an accident on day 665. If you're not willing to lose a limb or two for Jesus then I have serious doubts about your faith.
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HarrietTubmanPI - 2012-01-13
If I could make up anything I want and claim the company I work for fired me for not allowing me to have that belief? Technically, I should be able to make up a religion that only allows me to have a 3 day workweek.
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Oscar Wildcat - 2012-01-13 Convert to orthodox judaism, and you'll be pretty close to that.
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Caminante Nocturno - 2012-01-13
Five stars for the reporter's comically grandiose voice.
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BroodMother - 2012-01-13
Well it's not just a sticker!
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endlesschris - 2012-01-13
As goofy as this fuck is, the company was definitely infringing on his religious rights.
I doubt we'd find this as comical if it was a Jew being forced to sew a six-pointed star onto their uniform.
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Kieran27 - 2012-01-13 Oh, I'm sure there were other reasons. If this fellow believes that much in revelation and the number of the beast, chances are he also attempted to convert or witness to folks at the company.
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Syd Midnight - 2012-01-18 Is that why there were no jewish sherrifs in the Old West?
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Chancho - 2012-01-13
666 was the number of cocks this guy sucked. He knew that they knew.
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Riskbreaker - 2012-01-13
Cool story bro, you believe in imaginary creatures. You deserve a medal.
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TeenerTot - 2012-01-13
Why didn't he just wear it upside-down? Nothing wrong with 999.
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baleen - 2012-01-13 stars. my darling.
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Corpus Delectable - 2012-01-13
Oh, this is just the best, the BEST, I tell you! He "knows" he's going to lose his life over this one of these days.
But seriously, the way to have handled this on the employer's part would have just been to say, with a straight face, "Really? You're drawing the line at wearing 666? We've been spiking the coffee with the blood of innocents for over two years now, and you were cool with that. I guess we'll just have to buck you down to PFC Satanic Warrior, then. What? You didn't know? Hey, Brother Saggoth! He didn't know we were all Satanists! LOL!"
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Meerkat - 2012-01-13
You idiot, that passage is about pickling for large groups. That's the number of BEETS.
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fatatty - 2012-01-13
We all know the company was just looking for an excuse to fire this annoying turd.
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Rodents of Unusual Size - 2012-01-13
I have known two different people that deliberately got "666" as part of their phone number. It's a matter of great pride with both of them.
I actually feel sorry for this guy. Working for Mephistophcorp should have given him pause for concern but he realized his predicament all too late. Classic bait and switch!
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glendower - 2012-01-13
That guy is now my favorite newsman. I love the extremely sanguine narration.
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Billy the Poet - 2012-01-13
It's 616, it doesn't mean what he thinks it does, and there's no chance in hell that was the reason he was fired.
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paparatti - 2012-01-14
I suspect he was fired for being a bit of an arsehole, possibly for telling everyone they were going to burn in hell, rather than because he wouldn't wear a sticker.
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Reefer Fez - 2012-01-14
What I want to know is, does this company print up a shit-load of stickers everyday, or are these blank stickers that you fill in the number yourself with marker?
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Timothy A. Bear - 2012-01-14
The mark of the beast was a removable sticker the entire time.
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BorrowedSolution - 2014-01-20
I wonder how he justifies the fact that they probably made it through day 666 with zero cases of demonic possession. I guess God prevails despite the machinations of Satan, right?
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fluffy - 2014-05-26
I used to have a credit card whose last four digits were 6664. I ran across a surprising number of cashiers who refused to enter the last 4 digits when their POS systems asked them to for verification, and asked if I had another card that they could use instead. Usually they'd let me just enter it myself and say something to the effect of how my soul was on the line.
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