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Desc:Who gives hand jobs. Yes, hand jobs.
Category:Accidents & Explosions
Tags:lifetime, dirty jobs, ACTING!, jennifer love hewitt, past your prime
Submitted:Scrotum H. Vainglorious
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Comment count is 27
dairyqueenlatifah - 2013-01-01
This is a Lifetime original movie, and the ratings were successful enough that Lifetime decided to make an original series based of aforementioned original movie, which has been renewed for a second season to air this year.

Oh Jennifer, 14 year old me loved you and Brandy in "I Still Know What You Did Last Summer".
baleen - 2013-01-01
Middle class white women being forced to give handjobs. The horror of it all. When will this Obama Depression end? What's next, vaginal intercourse? Wake me up when this is all over.
StanleyPain - 2013-01-01
I think it's a great deal more than just hand jobs they are implying, but still....glad to see that Lifetime is still keeping up it's wonderful feminist tradition of movies that imply that, when all the chips are down, all it takes is a slight nudge to make a woman become a prostitute because OMG MONEY AND CLOTHES AND SEX AND DRESSING PRETTY...
bias - 2013-01-01
apparently there are massage places that restrict their happy endings exclusively to h.j's and i know this only because I've been reading the blog of a woman that works at one such establishment. I think she actually might be a consultant for this show. Google "Happyendingz" if you wanna check out her blog.

StanleyPain - 2013-01-01
I know in reality there are massage places that approve of hand-jobs, I'm just saying I think this movie probably goes further to imply these women do more.

Hooker - 2013-01-01
Why isn't this called Rub and Tug? Why?
B. Weed - 2013-01-01
Or "Happy Ending", for that matter?

Xenocide - 2013-01-01
There's already a show called Happy Endings, which has nothing to do with handjobs and is therefore a waste of time.

Rudy - 2013-01-02
Well how about "Unhappy Endings", then? Or "Rub and Tug and Disgrace Your Whole Family, You Slut"?

Xenocide - 2013-01-04
Spirit stars for Rudy.

garcet71283 - 2013-01-01
I for one am looking forward to Dean Cain, Ted Danson, Tony Danza and Wilfred Brimley getting jerked by Jennifer Love Hewitt.
Urist - 2013-01-01
Tried watching the first episode of this show.

She starts working at this place and the people getting the regular massages are all ugly hairy fat/old guys but when she steps up to giving happy endings it's nothing but hot male models coming in..

Pillager - 2013-01-01
No, it's like 'The Frog Prince'; they turn into studs after she whacks them.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-01-01
Or chugging their sperm makes her get enormous boobs! Why not go with that plotline? Use what you have, Jennifer Love Hewitt.

(note: Jennifer Love Hewitt only has a career because of her big cans)

Xenocide - 2013-01-01
I like how Lifetime original movies are always about women responding to shit by crying and being ashamed.

Because obviously we can't have the wife stand up for herself and say "Fuck you, I have kids to feed and it's just a job anyway," or turn it into a Weeds of Breaking Bad situation where she makes the most of an unsavory business and owns her mistakes. Nah, that would just be tacky.
kamlem - 2013-01-01
The young apprentice of Marianne Faithfull.
Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-01-01
I know several massage therapists, and I've been to a few massage workshops as a personal assistant to help set up and also be the guy that is used for demonstration purposes.

90% of all massage therapists give handjobs and just don't say anything. Yes, the number is that high. No, there is nothing shocking about it, Lifetime. For fuck's sake. Grow up.
Hooker - 2013-01-01
When The French Connection came out, it represented a new threshold in violence for American audiences, and generally set the tone for the the whole decade in film. However, when the basis for Popeye Doyle, NYPD detective Eddie Egan saw the film, he apparenly took exception to how soft Hackman was with criminals; the movie was actually tamer than reality.

That's basically what's happening here, too.

Rodents of Unusual Size - 2013-01-02
I met a massage therapist one time who said, and I quote "I just draw the line at rimming".

Can Jennifer Love Hewitt say that? No. Because she does not aim for success, that's why.

Scrotum H. Vainglorious - 2013-01-02
"to be that guy for demonstration purposes"

Where do I sign up for that gig?

Old_Zircon - 2013-01-02
I used to date a girl whose brother was an unlicensed massage therapist in NYC. Because he was unlicensed he was legally required to advertise his services as "body rubber."

Old_Zircon - 2013-01-01
FABIO - 2013-01-02
Isn't all commerce basically a handjob in one form or another?
Old_Zircon - 2013-01-02
Wrong kind of jobs.


delicatessen - 2013-01-02
The world's oldest profession.
BHWW - 2013-01-02
I had a suspicously similar TV series proposal I'd put together and attempted to present to Jennifer Love Hewitt but (at the time, I thought) she refused to read it, and escalated things by calling the police - I suppose I startled her somewhat by emerging from the crawlspace in her dressing room wall but c'mon, it wasn't that big of a deal.
Jet Bin Fever - 2013-01-07
I'd buy that for a dollar!
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