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Category:Pets & Animals
Tags:monitor, lizard, white people, Monitor Lizard
Submitted:Albuquerque Halsey
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Comment count is 21
Binro the Heretic - 2013-02-28
Lizards love warm stuff.

Stars for lizard contentment.
TeenerTot - 2013-02-28
I don't like when people make pets out of wild animals.

But they're just so cute with their giant lizard baby.
Binro the Heretic - 2013-02-28
How long does a species need to be bred in captivity before it no longer qualifies as a "wild" animal?

SolRo - 2013-02-28
There was a Russian genetics experiment where they very selectively bred wild foxes with more docile manerisms around humans. It took a long time, but they eventually ended up with a barking fox with floppy ears that liked being around people.

Don't know if such a thing would even be possible with a primative reptilian brain, but that aside, almost all captive reptile breeding is done for color variations or to make money.

wild wolves to early dogs took hundreds of years.

Kabbage - 2013-02-28
Wonder how many generations of incredibly pissed-off foxes they had to keep in captivity until they got the right ones.

Old_Zircon - 2013-02-28
Solro, it actually only took a couple generations, it was really fast.

Old_Zircon - 2013-02-28
The Russian experiment, I mean.

SolRo - 2013-03-01
couple generations of foxes still takes a while, they aren't fruit flies.

Cube - 2013-03-01
In Soviet Russia, they breed people that like foxes!

TeenerTot - 2013-03-01
To answer Binro, I tend to think that you should only keep as pets those animals which have come to depend on man, and would likely die if left to the wilds themselves. This could include those foxes...their fight-flight instinct had been bred out mostly.

If it does better without man's intervention, it probably shouldn't be a pet.

Just my opinion.

Binro the Heretic - 2013-03-01
You just described every domesticated animal, ever.

John Holmes Motherfucker - 2013-02-28
I used to have neighbors with an iguana, and they were always telling me about his unique personality. He liked warm stuff.
Caminante Nocturno - 2013-02-28
Film the lizard all you want, it will never care.
Sexy Duck Cop - 2013-03-01
They like being monitored.

Jet Bin Fever - 2013-02-28
Ectotherms and endotherms getting along.
ashtar. - 2013-02-28
A modern LCD monitor would take up half the space of that old analog dinosaur.
sjohnson301 - 2013-02-28
All the other problems aside, the best part was when the woman crouched down in the lizard's face and yelled "BIG BOY IS SLEEPING!" -- then blamed the husband for waking him up.
memedumpster - 2013-02-28
People who look like their pet's food. I love the cautious way they step around the lizard's potential anger.
SolRo - 2013-02-28
Related, if badly titled.


monitor lizard saliva is a lovely cocktail of deadly infection causing bacteria, Komodo monitors even use it to take down water bison...so this guy gets bit, acts tough about the wound, police find his body with his face and neck eaten off.
Xenagama Warrior Princess - 2013-03-01
It's not all of the time, however. Usually if they live in the wild their mouth tends to harbor all kinds of nasty bacteria due to the sanitation of their diet (e.g. detritus and wild animals that have been exposed to dangerous forms of bacteria, prions and parasites.) The Komodo Dragon is the only monitor lizard now suspected of harboring complex forms of venom glands rooted at the base of their teeth.

This owner is just flirting at best with a nasty wound if he gets bit with little bacterial infection depending on the sanitation of his lizard's diet (which in this case happens to be pre-killed frozen mice, soft-boiled eggs and insects.) Black-Throated Monitors are very tame compared to their asshole Nile Monitor cousins which that despite their nasty temperament are still used as pets. 'Big Boy' seems like he is handled quite frequently and has been from a very early age and like other lizards that are treated in the same manner they can become quite placid with their owners.

Spike Jonez - 2013-02-28
He does indeed seem to be monitoring that guy's throat pretty closely.
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