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Desc:On June 30 the Family Research Council wants you to drop to your knees and pray the gay away.
Category:Horror
Tags:, white people, conservatives, Xtians, just die already
Submitted:Scrotum H. Vainglorious
Date:06/30/13
Views:840
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Comment count is 7
SteamPoweredKleenex
Prayin' to god got the founders 8 years of war, huh? Sounds like ol' god was on the fritz if it took him that long to miraculously win the war for them.

Wait, you mean colonists died and stuff? Where was the miracle? What if they'd just prayed the Brits away? That would've only taken 5 years tops, right?

I love how god "might" hear your prayers. He's readied the weasel escape pod for when nothing happens.
Deplorable
I burst out laughing when I heard that, that god would be so gracious. Maybe the British were praying too, and god just favored the side giving him the most attention. I'd love to hear the explanation on that. Probably "mysterious ways".

Ocyrus
I'm beginning to think that those that pray the least, get the most of what they want.
Oscar Wildcat
Imagine being God and having all these violent stupid assholes ignoring pretty much everything your son said ( that kid they nailed to a tree and never took down ) yet constantly badgering you to fix football games and get them preferred rates on their mortgages?

Yeah, exactly. Everytime some queen in the Castro goes down on his boyfriend, you'd launch another hurricane at Iowa. Getting the picture there, flyover country?

TeenerTot
Oh, I'll be on my knees...
Oscar Wildcat
Stars for Reverend Douche. His son was named Nozzle.
memedumpster
Praying to the God of your king, who is the earthly incarnation of that god, for magic treason powers against your godking is so fucking stupid only Christians could have thought it would work.

Most likely Christians even then knew God was made up horseshit, so saw no contradiction.
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