Just because your last name is Eatdatpussy doesn't mean you actually have to.

I got lucky and got mine in Portland before lots of people started moving here and driving on a Saturday morning is more akin to a game of Paperboy (watch out for that flashmob in the middle of the street, the bicyclists occupying the freeway, myriad other stupid shit) so it was pretty easy. But the first time I really drove was when my ex and I won tickets to Florida; we had a rental car and about 1 minute on the freeway she just freaked out so I handled driving for the rest of the time, even though technically I wasn't old enough to be driving a rental car. And yeah, it's nuts down there! So many signs (like a U-turn on freeways? Can anyone help explain that to me?) that I just didn't understand.

So that was kind of my drivers' ed. I bike or walk, but I have to drive a company car at work, and while I don't zone out or anything when I'm on the freeway I've found it's a lot easier. The stakes are higher, which is what freaked me out initially about being on one, but ostensibly everybody else feels the same way so it's kind of an easy cruise now.

from what i discern from this post jesty is making regular unlicensed zoo runs due to forging his driving credentials in the ramshackle basket weaving/beard-as-cape culture of portland

I just don't turn until the light's green, even though here you can turn right on a red, and I've gotten honked at a couple times for it. Like sorry, but you never know. I witnessed a pretty bad accident once as a car did that and a bicyclist plowed right into the car because he had the green and she was probably just looking for cars. Hard to gage the bike's speed but he was plowing downhill, maybe 30 MPH. Everybody was luckily ok but after that red means red no matter what to me.

is he still squatting at that chicks house in LA?