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Desc:Oddly prescient!
Category:Humor, Classic TV Clips
Tags:bees, racism, internet of shit
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Comment count is 5
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2018-03-18
So is there a point to this "Google Assistant" they're trying to get me to activate every two minutes? I already have voice commands and voice searches, and that's very useful, since typing on a phone is torture. I tell Google what to do, Google does it. So what else is there?

I just read.a.review of Google Assistant by a writer who thought it was.dumb.because she couldn't get the assistant to tell her that it loved her. Okay, fine, I'm sure they'll fix this for her.

I dont want to come off like this is some kind of moral panic to me, like I'm afraid that talking to our phones will steal our humanity or something. It just seems dumb, and they won't stop bugging me about it. Clearly, this is important to them. It maybe something they hope to sell me, but my suspicion is that this is a new way to get marketable information out of me. And part of me is afraid that I'm going to give in, that I'm going to realize that I've always wanted a Google Assistant to love me unconditionally or whatever. Clearly that's what's supposed to happen, and the thought just nettles me.

I can remember years ago when some writers believed that Second Life was going to change the internet. Instead of a website that would organize information about merchandise into a searchable two dimensional page like a catalog, we'd all be shopping online by dragging our avatars through 3 dimensional virtual shopping malls. You couldn't explain to these people why this was a bad idea. Turning Online shopping, or online education, into a video game; could never do anything to make the objective of shopping or learning simpler or easier. It's adding difficulty and complexity in an effort to fake an experience than can only be faked

I think the whole idea of sex robots falls along these lines. I.don't think it's ever going to catch on. It's essentially making masturbation expensive, elaborate, and inconvenient. I don't think its going to make it better.

And maybe a Google assistant is like that? Is it adding more complexity to the interface with no practical benefit, just a fake experience? It's not a person, so why am I supposed to address it as a person? Are you just forcing me to pretend, or is it somehow easier than just hitting the button and naming my search terms?
betamaxed - 2018-03-18
Those bee shades would be really useful.
Hegemony Cricket - 2018-03-18
I'm gonna name the last two responses "asked" and "answered".
John Holmes Motherfucker - 2018-03-18

Old_Zircon - 2018-03-18
All more sensible than Juicero.
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