My prediction for February 2009: Sarah Palin gets a national talk show. (That lasts for twelve weeks.)
My prediction for March 2009: Palin is just a footnote in the annals of history
Gosh yeah. Sarah
"I voted against the Bridge to Nowhere,
I was exonerated by the Trooper-gate report,
I didn't spend as $150,000 on clothes and it wasn't my idea and I'm giving it back,
I build a non-existant pipeline,
I cut budgets in Alaska,
I supported Sudan divestment in Alaska,
I'm going to release my medical records,
I gave birth to Trig,
I visited Iraq and Ireland,
I've deployed the National Guard overseas,
Alaska produces 20% of our energy reserves,
Obama is a Marxist, friend of terrorists and wants to bankrupt coal,"
Palin is EXACTLY the person we need to add objectivity and truth to the media.
After all, she has a journalism degree and was a sportscaster. So you know, she's an expert on the First Amendment.
Does her brain just smash the "random generator" button every time she talks?
|Caminante Nocturno |
I am not going to miss the way this woman talks.
|Rodents of Unusual Size |
oh right, cause the unfairness of the media was responsible.
MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
Fuck you, whore.
I also greatly respect plumbers and I would like to get together with Joe and maybe lay some pipe.
Ha ha ha ha ha, yeah, it's the journalists' fault that you are incapable of opening your vapid folksy mouth without spitting out meaningless bullshit punctuated by blatant lies.
|Scrotum H. Vainglorious |
Does anyone understand what she just said?
Ok, I just figured it out. She talks with a false sense of importance. That is, her speech is pompous. She tries to make it sounds more important than it really is by using "big" and "complex" structures and words to give her normally flaccid utterances lift.
"I have such great respect for the role of the media in our democracy. It is the corner, it allows the checks and balances, but only when there is fairness and objectivity..."
How about: The media is a necessity to maintaining democracy as long as it remains objective.
I won't be missing her.
Classic Republican: It was everybody's fault but mine! You are a laughable joke of a political figure. Please become the new face of the Republican party, Sarah. Please.
|Killer Prunes |
meowmeowmeowmeow everyone picked on me D:
Into the sunset, endlessly griping.
Prolly didn't get coached on that one. But what can you expect from a Wasilla St. maverick?
|Robin Kestrel |
Go back to Alaska, you horrible woman.
Oh shit. The downfall of America is all the media's fault. Why didn't I see this before? WHY!??!
Goodbye and good riddance.
|Spit Spingola |
Nice interview you're hired.
I could not take another 4 years of having stupid in the whitehouse... It just isn't funny anymore.
oh wait, DAMN YOU BIDEN!
Ah, but he's not stupid, he's just got a good old case of verbal diarrhea.
Its the best of both worlds. We keep the amusingly foolish gaffes, yet lose the candidates that think Africa is a country and can't pronounce 'nuclear'.
HURF BLURF DUH
Yes but with Obama as president, the VP position can just go back to being an irrelevant cipher. You think Biden's goin to draw a single TV camera away from him? Ha.
Sarah Palin would never pass the Turing test.
|a flaming monkey |
Yes, it's he media's fault for asking you questions you couldn't answer properly.
Reporter: What do you take away from this election.
Palin: A free wardrobe.
Y'know I hope she DOES use that journalism degree. "Ask Sarah" could be our generation's "Dear Abby."
A fundie, illiterate, hateful "Dear Abby."
BUT SHE WANTS TO HELP THE MEDIA
Back in 1973 Eric Meissner saw a National Enquirer contest to make the world's smallest playable violin and he went to work.
Under the assumption that the record was 5 1/2 inches he built a violin 3 1/2 inches only to find that the record had dropped to 1 31/32 inches so he went to work again.
This time he succeeded in building the world's smallest violin which measured a meager 1 5/8 inches in length.
Tonight Sarah, I'm requesting a song for you.
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