|HURF BLURF DUH |
Where the hell is that shower coming from
I used this soap throughout middle school until I realized that I REEKED of it all day long. It really does deodorise, I just simply am not alcoholic enough to require this soap at this point in my ife.
|Big Beef Burritos Supreme |
Aaaaah, my skin is so dry and uncomfortable, all day long.
Lately, I've seen red, I've tasted blood, I've killed with words, I've wished and hoped and swam through a river of snot twice as wide as the mighty Mississippi, but I wanna know about the commercial I saw on TV: An Irish guy, walking through a field of green, whistling one of those Irish jigs, and a woman walks up and says, "Manly yes, but I like it too."
Then the guy pulls out a huge knife and cuts off his first two fingers, and somehow catches them in what's left of his left hand, and hands them to the woman.
Did I mention they're both dressed in green?
Then they both sing this song together: "Are ya icky? Are ya sticky? Are ya hot as anything? Hey cut off two of your fingers and stab yourself in the eye!" Then he stabs himself in the eye and hands her the knife, and she stabs herself in the eye-okay? okay? So what about that?
Then they join arms and do this Irish folk dance while taking turns dismembering each other. This was a commercial for deodorant, I think, or soap or something
So now all the body parts are lying in a heap, but the heads are still singing, "Are ya icky? Are ya sticky? Are ya hot as anything? Hey! Get away from summer, and cut off all your limbs!" Then all of the body parts start hopping and bopping around like little bunny rats, then they jump into the mouths of the singing heads, but then they just slip right back out through the severed necks and keep bopping about.
It's very beautiful music that's playing; there's an Irish flute and a mandolin, I think, and the background singers sound just like the Clancy brothers. It's really a wonderful commercial, spectacular. It must of cost a fortune to make. The kind of commercial you'd see during the Super Bowl, maybe, where the advertising time costs a million dollars. A half a minute. Wow, imagine that: A million dollars for a half a minute!
Anyway, by the end of it, It looks like the two of them have been through a juicer, or a food processor or a blender or something- It's just a pink puree of blood, bone and flesh in a big bucket, but it's still singing somehow "Are ya icky? Are ya sticky? Are ya hot as anything? Hey! Blend yourself, process yourself, become a glass of animal juice! Haven't you had enough of fruit juices and vegetable juices? Next time company comes over, offer them a cool refreshing glass of yourself! Give of yourself! Stop being such a selfish piece of snot, Okay? Okay? Okay!"
"And now, back to our program."
ProfessorChaos has never heard of King Missile.
Sure and me sweater is so nice and thick too.
Not enough car-bombs.
The soap cutting always got me...why? Why would you cut open a bar of soap? It doesn't make for a particularly compelling cross-section. I half expect him to pop the soap shaving into his mouth.
I vaguely recall cutting many bars of soap to ribbons as a child...or at least attempting as much.
Are wacky ad campaigns still this puzzling yet enticing to children? I mean, current advertisements. Are they still as psychologically damaging?
I used to be terrified of Fruit Roll-Ups, because I was convinced I would become a giant Fruit Roll-Up with a human head, hands, and feet if I ever ate one.
Maybe I was just a weird kid.
HURF BLURF DUH
You have to remember that in those days, soap was white. Just plain ol' white. I think Dial soap may have been yellow.
This was the advent of deodorant soaps, and the layers were supposed to make you go WOO LAYERS OF FRESH SCENT
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